Chocolate Ice
by 0-WateryTart-0
Summary: Buffy, Giles, snow and Band Candy. Lots of angst ensues. (WARNING: Buffy/Giles romance)
1. Prologue

CHOCOLATE ICE  
a _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_ fanfic  
by Viv

Pairing: Buffy/Giles  
Rating: T (this is an edited version of an adult story - for the complete version, please go to the Buffy/Giles section of www .neptunienne. net)  
Feedback: Please! Constructive comments and criticism are very welcome  
Disclaimer: All characters mentioned in this story belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox Television, etc. The story is written for the pleasure of the author and readers, and has no lucrative purpose whatsoever. Please don't reproduce this story anywhere without the author's consent.   
Notes: The story starts out in Season 3, after "Helpless", but before "Bad Girls". This story is a response to Julia on the Buffy/Giles ML, which required Buffy and Giles getting snowed in somewhere and smoochiness ensuing.

**Prologue**

'I'm in a little wooden hut on the slopes of a mountain. Outside it's snowing so strong that it's impossible to see a thing, or to go outside. But it's all warm here 'cause there's a fire in the fireplace, and I have Keanu Reeves to keep me warm.' Buffy smiled happily at the nice picture she had just described, and opened her eyes again.

'Is he naked?' Asked Faith, who was sitting next to her on the library table, loudly chewing gum and visibly bored. Buffy had been trying to teach her how to play "Anywhere But Here". However, the usually cute and romantic fantasies she and Willow used to think up just tended to turn into porn movies when it was Faith's turn to invent them.

'That could be arranged,' conceded Buffy with a grin. Faith shrugged.

'Damn I'm bored. Where's G-man?' She exclaimed, looking around the room.

'I dunno, but he's usually punctual. He'll be here soon. I think he called us in for something about that furry monster I ran into the other night.'

'Yeah, well I'm waiting five more minutes, then I'm outta here,' let out Faith, bounding off the table to pace around the library like a panther trapped in a cage. 'Calling _me_ in on a Saturday morning...' She grumbled threateningly.

'I guess I don't need to ask if you had fun last night, then,' said Buffy with a grin. Faith's lack of sleep was quite obvious, considering her crankiness and the dark rings under her eyes. However, she just shrugged casually. The library doors suddenly swung open and Giles walked in briskly. He was wearing a thick sweater and a white woollen scarf.

'What's with the clothes? No tweed on weekends?' Let out Faith, eyeing him up, and smirking. Giles seemed taken aback for a moment, looked down at his clothes, then back at Faith with a sarcastic expression.

'Ha ha, very funny, I'm sure,' he replied dryly, striding up to the table where Buffy was sitting.

'So, why did you call us so early in the morning?' asked Buffy.

'Better be for a good reason, I'm not a morning person,' muttered Faith, walking towards the Watcher.

'Well, do you remember that furry demon you fought with a couple of days ago? Tall, smelly, very strong, a bit like a giant ape?' Buffy nodded, recalling the strange beast. Its face had been a cross between a bear's and a gorilla's, and it was covered with white fluff. She had found it trying to get into a house, and had chased it. They'd fought, and she'd managed to break one of its arms, but then it had fled. She would have probably been able to catch up with it, if she hadn't slipped on a patch of ice, which was really unusual in Sunnydale, even in early February.

'Well, I believe that this monster is what they commonly call a Yeti, in Nepal. You know, the abominable Snowman?' Faith snickered as she hauled herself onto the edge of the table again.

'You mean Bigfoot is back in town,' she said with a grin. 'Maybe he'll be a bit more of a man than the geeks who live in Sunnydale.'

'Well, actually the Yeti isn't some kind of missing link or disproportionate ape, as some people think,' continued Giles, ignoring Faith's comment. 'He's an Ice Demon. The Nepalese fear and revere him, because he has incredible powers. Such as to make ice and snow.'

'Oh,' let out Buffy. 'So the ice I skidded on was a present from Yeti-guy. He is so going to regret having made me break a nail.' Giles rolled his eyes theatrically at her shallowness. 'So, what was ape-man trying to do in town, anyway?'

'He was trying to feed,' said Giles. Buffy raised a brow. 'On children.' Buffy crinkled her nose at the thought. Faith merely snapped a chewing-gum bubble nonchalantly.

'I am so happy he just ended up breaking one of my nails. So, what do we do now? Will he be back?' Giles unfolded a map on the table. A pentagram was drawn on it in red felt tip.

'No. Now that you've wounded him, he's probably retreated back to his lair to look after his arm.'

'So how do we find his hidey-hole before he kills more kids?' asked Buffy, glancing at the map.

'I looked up some regional papers and found out that a child had gone missing in every town at the points of the pentagram, apart from Sunnydale which is the last point. The centre is the Coastal Range. He must live somewhere around there,' he said, pointing to a black dot drawn in the middle of the five-pointed star.

'Looks like you're gonna see your "Anywhere But Here" fantasy come true, B.,' teased Faith.

'Oh, so that's why you've got all those woolly clothes on!' exclaimed Buffy to Giles, trying to divert his attention and her own from what Faith had just said.

'Precisely,' replied Giles.

'Sounds cool to me. I'm in,' said Faith.

'Ah Faith... A-Actually I-I think it would be best if... if you stayed here and held the fort while Buffy and I slay the monster,' let out Giles nervously. Faith looked disappointed.

'You don't trust me,' she pouted.

'Of course - of course I do, Faith, otherwise... I wouldn't trust you to-to stay here and keep the Sunnydale vampires and monsters at bay.' Faith frowned, irritated.

'Why does Buffy always get to do the fun stuff?' she asked.

'Fun? I'm going to freeze my butt off, my lips are going to be all chapped and I'll fight some great big guy who smells like he hasn't had a shower since his birth - 1000 years ago. As a bonus, I'm sure I'll have fascinating lectures about how snow melts, with England here.' Giles sighed in despair. 'But I'm in. I guess. If you ask me nicely.' He glared at her. 'If you say pretty please,' added Buffy with a grin. Faith rolled her eyes at the pair of them and decided that she had no chance to get between them anyway.

'Go pack your bags, I still have to arrange accommodation,' he replied dryly, folding up the map and doing his best to dodge Buffy's demand.

'Giiiiles?' teased Buffy. 'If you don't say it, you can go kill Bigfoot all by yourself.' He frowned and looked down at her.

'Buffy, would you please come along with me to slay the big bad monster of the mountains?' He asked. She stared up at him expectantly. 'Pretty please.' he growled between his teeth, his voice barely audible. Buffy grinned and got up.

'See, that wasn't so hard!' He glowered at her, and wordlessly went to his office to find them a place to sleep in the closest mountain resort.

'How cute, Watcher/Slayer closeness in the snow. Pass the barf bag,' let out Faith with a mildly angry and disgusted expression.

'Sorry, Faith, next time I promise I'll let you go and have all the fun you can take with Giles,' answered Buffy, grinning.

'Like you'd let me go pelvic on _your_ Watcher, B.,' she replied with a smirk. Buffy flushed wildly with an expression of utter shock.

'I... no _way_... that's just... hey!' she started incoherently, not even knowing herself what she was protesting against. Giles walked back into the library at that moment, which made her close her mouth and drop her gaze to the floor immediately.

'Everything all right in here?' He asked, slightly puzzled at the red tinge on Buffy's face and Faith's mischievous expression.

'Yeah, uh... I've gotta go pack my bags!' let out Buffy hurriedly, turning to leave. Giles glanced at his watch.

'Yes, and remember to take sensible clothes. I'll come and pick you up in...' he heard the Library door swing shut after Buffy, and let out a sigh, rolling his eyes. '... in an hour or so.'


	2. Bad Girl

CHOCOLATE ICE  
a _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_ fanfic  
by Viv

Pairing: Buffy/Giles  
Rating: T to M (this is an edited version of an adult story - for the complete version, please go to the Buffy/Giles section of www .neptunienne. net)  
Feedback: Please! Constructive comments and criticism are very welcome  
Disclaimer: All characters mentioned in this story belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox Television, etc. The story is written for the pleasure of the author and readers, and has no lucrative purpose whatsoever. Please don't reproduce this story anywhere without the author's consent.  
Notes: The story starts out in Season 3, after "Helpless", but before "Bad Girls". This story is a response to Julia on the Buffy/Giles ML, which required Buffy and Giles getting snowed in somewhere and smoochiness ensuing.

Part 1: Bad Girl

'God Giles, I swear my toes are gonna fall off! Haven't you ever heard of frostbite!' cried Buffy after her Watcher. They had been walking in the snow for three hours now, both of them carrying heavy backpacks, and she was completely frozen. Her feet were soaked by the snow that had got in from the top of her boots, her gloves had become wet once she'd fallen into the snow a couple of times, and her nose was constantly dripping. She must have been a horrible sight, maybe even gross enough to frighten the Yeti himself.

'Well then at last we'll have a real-life example of what a "fashion victim" is,' replied Giles dryly. 'I told you to wear decent clothes.'

'I refuse to wear boots that make me look like I'm going on a mission to the Moon,' retorted Buffy. 'Why don't they have Sunny-Beach or Tropical-Island demons? All we ever get is Ice Demons or Sewer Monsters!' Giles rolled his eyes.

'Buffy, for Pete's sake, stop feeling sorry for yourself!' he growled at her, obviously made just as grumpy as her by the snow and cold.

'Why should I? I gave up an afternoon of shopping with my Mom because of you!' she complained.

'So? You're the Slayer, it asks for some sacrifices! You're acting like a six-year-old brat.' Irked by that last comment, Buffy actually felt herself start to seethe with anger. It warmed her up a little.

'A six-year-old, huh?' She muttered under her breath, stopping in her tracks and letting Giles plod along in the snow by himself. 'I'll give you six-year-old...'

'You know very well that I myself would have preferred to stay at home in the warm with a good book and a cup of tea,' continued Giles, too concentrated on advancing through the thick snow to notice that Buffy wasn't next to him anymore. 'But have you seen me compl...' There was a splat, and a jolt, and freezing wetness.

Buffy grinned, very pleased with herself. She had hit him right where she had wanted, the only place that was uncovered by layers of clothing, the back of his head, and his left ear. With a bit of luck, the melted snow would actually drip down his neck for extra bonus points. She had always been good at snowball fights, when her parents had brought her on skiing trips with her cousin. The white powder fell off Giles' hair as he slowly turned his head to glare at her furiously.

'Told you you should have chosen a hat with ear-flaps,' she taunted with a wicked smile, before starting her trek again, walking past him. Which she regretted instantly. Buffy squealed when he grabbed her jacket and shoved snow down her back. She'd been completely unprepared for his attack, deeming him way too old to actually fight back. But now... this was war!

From a crevice between the rocks, the icy blue pair of eyes watched in dismay as the two people down the hill chased around, hurling snow at each other, one of them shrieking with laughter and cold from time to time, the other alternatively chuckling and growling curses. The figure that watched them wondered how unconscious they could be. And how long it would be before they found his lair. Particularly as he recognised the blonde figure who was having snow rubbed into her scalp. He thought that he'd better take action before they trapped him.

'All right, all right, now I've lost my glasses!' announced Giles breathlessly, holding his hands up at Buffy to ask for a truce. She kept her grip on the snowball she had just made.

'Is that another one of your tricks?' She asked, raising a curious brow. She could have sworn he hadn't been wearing them for some time now.

'No, really...' he said, crouching down and searching the snow. Buffy dropped her snowball and bent over to help him look. After all, having a Watcher with her was annoying enough, let alone having a _blind_ one.

With a thud, snow landed right at the back of her head, making her left ear ring a little and causing droplets to drip into her already soaked clothes and hair. She turned to Giles and glared at him. He smirked smugly at her, pointing at the glasses in his hand.

'I must be going potty, they were in my pocket all the time,' he said. Buffy was about to haul herself at him and show him how nice it was to get your hair caked with snow, when a low rumble caught her attention.

'Buffy, look out!' Giles' scream caused her to mechanically throw herself in his direction, and she felt something whirr next to her as she went. She rolled in the snow by her Watcher, and sat up again to look at what had nearly hit her. A giant snowball was rolling down the side of the mountain, gaining size and speed as it went. More rumbling indicated more balls falling.

'Move, quick!' she yelled, forcefully grabbing Giles' arm and hauling him under the cover of a cluster of rocks. The giant pellets kept on falling, some soaring over their heads, showering them with powdery snow. Giles slipped his backpack off his shoulders and started searching for something to defend them.

'Looks like Ice Demon decided to share our snowball fun,' muttered Buffy, peering over the top of the rock that sheltered them, and immediately ducking back down as more gigantic balls tumbled towards her. She cringed at the idea of what one of them could do to her if it hit her in the face.

'Here, try this,' he said, handing her a crossbow. Buffy frowned at him.

'Giles, there's no way I can hit him. He knows where we're hiding, and he won't stop before he knows that we're dead.' Giles sighed.

'Do you have anything better to offer?' An idea suddenly struck Buffy.

'I'm going to distract him. In the meantime, you can shoot at him.'

'Are you stark raving...' Giles started indignantly, but Buffy had already lunged out of their hiding place into plain view. He shuddered, trying to stop himself from thinking of what would happen to her if she got hit.

'Hey!' She shouted. 'Come get me if you can!' Her provocation was nearly instantly met with another shower of snow blocks. Giles could have even sworn that he'd seen ice projectiles the size of a beer barrel miss Buffy only by inches. He gritted his teeth, shuddering, hoping that she truly was agile enough to avoid the shower of snow boulders sent by the Ice Demon.

'Bloody hell,' he muttered, replacing his glasses onto his nose before carefully peering over the rock behind which he was hiding. Apparently, the demon had decided that he wanted to get rid of the girl who had broken his arm, and wasn't giving him any attention. Giles steadied his trembling hands, took his aim, and the arrow whizzed out of the crossbow.

There was a blood-curdling scream from the crack between the rocks. Giles smiled in satisfaction. His arrow had hit the monster right in the face, probably taking out one of its eyes. At the sound of the demon's howl, Buffy stopped somersaulting between the falling snowballs and looked up at the cave where the monster was hiding, to see what had happened.

She hardly heard Giles' cry before the block of snow hit her in the flank. Buffy swirled in the air like a snowflake in the wind, the ball exploding into powder as it touched her. She rolled down the hill and was only stopped when her curled-up body slammed into a pine-tree, a little further down. Giles ran to her, oblivious to any remaining danger, the only thought going through his mind being that she was probably wounded and needed his help. He grabbed her slight body and dragged her behind the rock, for shelter, as fast as he possibly could. Buffy was half conscious and mumbled a curse about snowballs. Actually, Giles felt thankful that the pellet had only been made out of snow, and hadn't contained any ice shards. He was thinking that things really couldn't get any worse, when big snowflakes started to fall. Giles looked up at the grey sky, then at the semi-conscious Slayer.

'For bloody Heaven's sake, what next?' he muttered gruffly, shaking Buffy slightly to make her regain consciousness. Her only response was a groan and more incoherent mumbling. She was obviously in no state to fight the demon right now, or to walk back to the town. Giles let out a sigh and drew a broadsword out of their bags, along with a phial containing an orange mixture and some matches. Fortunately, he still had this solution. Holding an old magic volume in one hand and his implements in the other, he started to perform the ritual.

Carefully, Giles entered the cave, Buffy's arm slung around his neck to support her weight, his rucksack hanging on his other shoulder and the sword in his free hand. He had expected it to be an ice-cave, a crack that led under a glacier or something similar, which was the usual habitat of snow demons. However, it was simply a cold and dark tunnel made out of damp rock. He mused that it was probably not the demon's true home, but rather the first place where it had been able to find safety after it had been wounded. Gently, he lowered Buffy down so that she sat against the wall, and was rewarded with a low groan from the stunned Slayer. She had more or less been able to walk into the cave with his help, which was proof enough that she didn't have any serious injuries. However, she was still very dazed, and the monster needed to be dealt with quickly. An injured Ice Demon became all the more dangerous; it would never let them get away from his mountain alive. Giles let out a sigh, then knelt down in front of Buffy. He had no other choice.

'I'm going to deal with the demon,' he told her quietly. 'If I'm not back once you feel better, try to find my sword to kill him, all right?' She gazed at him blankly, then nodded a little. He hoped that she had understood him, although he doubted it, considering the tumble she had just had. Slowly, Giles stood up, took a deep breath to muster up all the courage he could find, and wandered into the depths of the cave, holding his broadsword in his left hand and an electric torch in the other, praying to any god out there to keep him and the Slayer safe.

* * *

Buffy finally snapped out of the daze when she heard a scream and the sound of slashed flesh. She jumped to her feet, and immediately regretted it when her ankle actually crunched. She moaned with pain, feeling all her body wake up to the joys of bruising and strained muscles. But her worry for her Watcher was far more important than her physical condition. She dragged herself as fast as she could through the dark tunnel. With every step she took, she felt the temperature drop, until she finally arrived to a part of the tunnel that was covered with ice. A thick layer glazed the walls, the floor and the ceiling in a shiny opalescent coat. Buffy cringed at the thought of having to limp through the ice while she still felt dizzy. She was going to have a hell of a time, and yet more bruises. 

Just as she set foot onto the slippery surface, she heard footsteps. They were slow and heavy, accompanied by panting. Buffy moved backwards, frowning hard. She couldn't have told whose screams had woken her up from her stupor. She knew that the demon had sharp claws, but then Giles had taken a sword with him. It could have been either of them getting cut to pieces. God, please let it be the demon! Her heart started to thump violently in her chest, and her throat knotted. She could hear the steps come closer and closer to her, the breath was raucous, laboured... whoever it was, he was exhausted. Buffy suddenly didn't want to see the face of the figure that was slowly appearing in the distance, preceded by a small patch of light. And what if it wasn't Giles? What if he had been savagely killed by the monster's claws? Buffy felt dread clutch at her throat, her legs started to tremble. And if it was the monster, would she even be strong enough to fight it, and avenge her Watcher?

'Buffy?' The Slayer took in a long, relieved gasp of air as she recognised his voice. It was Giles. A tired, weak and stumbling Giles, but Giles all the same. Buffy felt a sudden urge to run to him and hold him tight in her arms, incredibly glad to see him safe and sound. She frowned a little, and wondered where that sudden surge of affection had come from.

'I'm here, Giles,' she said, as she caught a glance of him at last, when he was close enough. He was covered with frost and something that looked like mucus. His hair was a mess, and one of the sleeves of his thick jacket seemed to have been slashed. Three red gashes marked his cheek, probably where the claws of the demon had caught him. When Giles arrived to her and off the patch of ice, he slowly lowered himself to the floor and threw his head back, breathing in sharply.

'God, that was a close call,' he muttered, wiping slime off his face. Buffy wordlessly watched him. She hadn't often seen him in such a light. Like the hero who came back to the damsel in distress, after killing the evil dragon. But that was what he looked like. Just like some hero out of an epic poem. She smiled at the idea, and also sat down.

'Rough fight, huh?' she asked sheepishly.

'Very. He was rather resilient to all the getting killed part of things,' muttered Giles. After a beat, he looked up at Buffy with a tired glare. 'I've been around you too much. I'm picking up your dreadful manner of speaking.' Buffy managed a small grin.

'And I always thought that reading made your speaking English good,' she replied.

'Remind me to laugh when I get my lungs back,' he replied dryly, still breathless.

'What happened to your cheek?' asked Buffy, squinting at the bleeding wound.

'A brief encounter with razor-sharp claws,' he sighed, wincing, as if the fact that Buffy had mentioned it had revived the pain in his flesh.

'And how did you kill Yeti-man, then?' She asked. Giles slumped down a little further.

'I put a fire spell on my sword. It allowed the blade to have the power of flames... and that's pretty lethal for ice demons.' With a sigh, Giles hauled himself up again. 'Come on, I'm dying for a cup of tea and my thermos is at the entrance of the cave.' Buffy also managed to push herself onto her feet, and they slowly and painfully made their way to their bags.

'I can't believe this!' Exclaimed Buffy in awe, as she saw the snowstorm outside the cave. Giles glanced at it briefly, nearly nonchalantly, while he scoured through his bag, seeking his precious thermos flask. Buffy was unable to see a thing. It was very dark outside, the snowflakes covering the view totally. She glanced at her watch, and was surprised to find that it was already six o'clock. Sunset wouldn't be long now... how the hell were they going to get back to their hotel? She limped back towards Giles, shivering.

'So, what's the plan? We stay in the cave and freeze to death?' Giles was sipping at the steaming tea, and nodded faintly.

'That's the plan,' he let out. Buffy gazed at him in shock.

'You're serious?' she cried. 'Isn't there anything we can do?'

'The snow is the result of my killing the Ice Demon. When he felt his end close, he used all his power to create the storm. If we try to go out there, we'll get lost and be buried under piles of snow. Whereas here, at least, we have some shelter, damp and cold as it is.' Buffy let out a long sigh.

'This is no good,' she whined. 'I was so looking forward to sleeping in a comfy bed in a warm room after this trek.' Giles rolled his eyes at her.

'What was it I said about you acting like a six year-old?' Buffy gave him a filthy look.

'Yeah, and that's the reason why my clothes are soaking wet.' She shuddered at the thought.

'The nerve you have! Who started it?' He growled back, still drinking his tea, which was so hot that it numbed his mouth and lips. She pouted.

'I didn't expect you to fight back!' she protested.

'Well then it will serve you right for thinking that I'm a mug,' he muttered in return. Then he smiled fondly. 'Actually, I quite enjoyed it.' Buffy snorted.

'I'm sure you did. Shoving snow down my back and into my hair like that... did anyone tell you that you're a big bully when it comes to snowballs?' He chuckled a little, and she let herself drop down onto the floor next to him.

'Care for some tea?' He asked, handing her the plastic cup. She thankfully took it and sipped at the burning liquid, feeling its heat permeate her through her lips and her hands.

'Giles, you sure we're not going to freeze to death in here?' she asked worriedly. He shook his head.

'We have our sleeping bags. And the monster - thank goodness - made its nest out of dry branches and twigs. I'm pretty sure we can make a fire.' Buffy nodded, and shivered again, sipping more tea to keep warm.

'What about our clothes? It can't be good to hang around in a sopping wet sweater.' Giles nodded.

'Our anoraks are waterproof, so they should keep us warm. I think we'd better lose the rest until it dries. After getting the wood, of course.' Buffy let out a long sigh. This journey really hadn't turned out as she had planned. It was fortunate for her that Giles had such a good sense of survival. She wondered where Book-Guy could have picked that up.

'Hey, were you in the Boy Scouts?' she asked, grinning evilly. Giles looked at her with a mildly irritated expression, then hauled himself onto his feet.

'Come, let's go and get that wood,' he said, ignoring her question. Buffy stood up too, silently cursing Yeti-snowballs and pine-trees for her aches. She quickly followed Giles, who was making his way down the tunnel again.

'Hey, you didn't answer my question. Were you a boy scout?' He didn't look at her, and she started to chuckle as she imagined mini-Giles in a scout costume.

'What gave you that silly idea anyway?' asked Giles gruffly as they slowly advanced through the cave.

'Well, you're just so well organised and calm in survival situations, so it sorta shows,' she said, grinning.

'Is claiming that I'm a distant cousin of the McGuyver family going to stop you from trying to pry that kind of embarrassing information out of me?' he asked dryly. Buffy clapped her hands and exploded with laughter.

'Oh so you do have some pop culture?' she managed between two giggles.

'Occasionally,' he replied laconically, as they arrived in front of the ice-covered segment of the cave.

'This sucks,' declared Buffy, nervously glancing at the ice.

'Oh well, you wanted to see an of ice show. You're going to have a ball,' commented Giles sarcastically.

'Usually the people have ice skates on and they don't fall flat on their faces,' replied Buffy, slowly following Giles onto the slippery surface. 'How the hell did you manage to get to the monster and back without...' Buffy slipped, and caught Giles' arm quickly, nearly dragging him off his balance too. He managed to stabilise himself and haul her up again.

'Maybe because I'm wearing proper boots?' he offered sardonically.

'Maybe 'cause you're so heavy it's like you're attached to the ground anyway,' snapped Buffy in return, still holding his arm in case she slipped again.

'And I thought that you actually liked ice-skating,' he taunted her, as they slowly advanced over the smooth surface.

'Sure, when I have skates, the proper clothes and that my body isn't aching everywhere, I love ice skating,' replied Buffy. The tunnel slowly grew into a chamber. The Slayer wrinkled her nose at the stench, and at the view of the half melted Ice Demon pieces that littered the floor, lying in puddles of goo that looked just like mucus. Icicles loomed over them on the ceiling, and Buffy flinched and cursed as water from an icicle dripped down her back. Giles smiled, as he made his way over the pieces of monster and to its nest.

'It looks like the ice in here is melting,' he said. 'It was mostly caused by the demon, I suppose. With a bit of luck, the snow won't last either, once the demon's powers dissipate.' He hauled an armful of small branches against his chest.

'But then it will be dark outside and we won't be able to walk back to the village anyway,' grumbled Buffy. 'So we're still stranded here, whatever happens.' She walked over to help Giles carry wood back through the tunnel.

'Yes, I'm afraid we are,' he sighed. 'Is it so terrible to have to spend the night with an old stick-in-the-mud like me?' Buffy chuckled.

'Better than getting buried in the snow, I guess,' she said as they carefully made their way across the ice. 'Then again, I might change my mind if you start giving me a lecture about stalactites and stalagmites. I swear I'll run away, storm or no storm, if you do.' Giles chuckled a little.

'Fine then. But don't you start whining again,' he said with a smile.

'I do not whine!' protested Buffy. 'Just grumble and moan a bit about stuff that annoys me and... well all right, I'll try not to,' she finally agreed. They put down their pile of wood onto the floor.

'Well, I'll start the fire up, if you'll please go and get the rest of the branches for me.' Buffy sniffed.

'Man make fire, woman carry wood,' said Buffy in a cavewoman's voice. 'I get the picture.' And she marched off towards the demon's lair again. Giles let out a small sigh as he collected some stones and tried to organise a fire. The wood was damp, but with the help of an old newspaper that he had taken along just in case, it started to burn, producing a pleasant warmth that thawed his frozen hands a little. He sat back and fed the fire with more wood, until he felt its heat start to fill the small room. Happy with his work, Giles got up to barricade the entrance of the cave with snow. At least that would keep the warmth in, and the wind out. He ignored the sound of Buffy slipping on the ice, falling over and using words that were very unsuitable for young women, and had nearly walled himself and Buffy inside the cave when she finally arrived with more wood - and bruises.

'Giles, are you plain crazy?' She exclaimed when she saw what he had done. 'Do you want us to asphyxiate and freeze to death?' Giles turned to her and looked at her wearily.

'First of all, there's enough space between the top of the entrance and my snow wall for us and a dozen elephants to breathe, and secondly how do you think Eskimos keep warm in igloos?' Buffy pouted and put the wood down in a pile next to the fire.

'I just thought they shared a hell of a lot of body heat,' she muttered, teasing the fire with a twig. Giles tried to avoid putting what Buffy had just said into pictures in his mind. He was sure that it was a completely innocent comment, but sometimes she just didn't realise how provocative she could be... he sighed inwardly. The fact that she was so incredibly attractive didn't help any. He closed down that line of thought before he even started going there. He was going to have to sleep in this small cave with her tonight, and probably with less clothes than he was wearing right now. Getting himself aroused was really a bad idea.

'Yes, well...' He cleared his throat. 'I think that maybe... maybe we should... be rid of these... clothes,' he said, looking down at his soaked trousers. The contact with the humid cloth was starting to irritate his skin.

'Yeah, sure, Giles, I'm certain it absolutely will not be awkward at all for us to walk around half naked in a cave while our clothes dry.' Giles actually felt himself flush, and kept his eyes on his snow wall, patting imaginary holes out of it. He took in a deep breath and faced his defiant Slayer.

'Look, we-we...' He breathed again, trying to control his stutter and the redness that spread over his face. 'We'll stay in our sleeping bags and anoraks. Does that sound decent enough to you?' Buffy shrugged and made her way to their backpacks, to pull out the sleeping bags from them.

'I guess it will be OK,' she conceded, still fumbling in the bags. 'But what if there's an emergency? Like another ice demon coming to borrow a cup of mucus from its neighbour?' Giles glared at her. 'Well forgive me for living on the Hellmouth where that kind of thing actually happens every day!' Giles sighed and came to pull his sleeping bag out of its waterproof carrier and spread it down onto the cold ground.

'Let's just hope it doesn't come to that,' he said gruffly, desperately concentrating on his job rather than on the idea of Buffy running after a snow demon dressed only in her underwear. He felt that it was going to be a very long night for him and that he would have to very frequently keep his indecent thoughts in check.

Buffy watched as Giles laid down his bed, and started to do the same. She smiled behind his back, loving the way he had actually flushed when she had started to bug him about being half naked. She actually quite liked the idea. It wasn't as if he was going to try his luck with her, not in this reality, anyway. She still felt a little ashamed of thinking of her Watcher like that. But yeah, she was attracted to him. And she liked him. A lot. However, there was Angel in Sunnydale. She couldn't forget about him, she still loved him. At least she was sure of that... well, nearly. Sunnydale was so far away...

'So, how do we do it next? Both turn around to strip?' Giles looked up at her, taken aback by the question. She was pretty sure that he was going to stutter and stumble on words and get even more embarrassed and flushed. Then his expression shifted a little, became more confident.

'No, actually there's quite a clever trick for that...' He slipped his arms inside of his jacket, and started fumbling under it. 'It's quite possible to get the wet clothes off underneath the anorak.' Buffy nodded, and started doing the same. Damn, she wasn't going to be able to taunt him about taking peeks of her undressing. She wasn't quite sure if he was just really stuffy and embarrassed to see anything more than a woman's knee, or if he was so jumpy right now because he was in this situation with her in particular. While she battled with her soaked pullover, she decided that she was going to go with thinking he was a prude. To believe that he might actually want her was a possibility that boggled her mind too much to her taste. She saw Giles shake a sopping wet shirt out of his jacket, cursing.

'We wouldn't have had to do this if you hadn't started this stupid snowball fight,' he grumbled. Buffy grinned at him.

'Hey, I thought we had a rule about whining,' she retorted, finally unzipping her anorak a little, so that she could push her pullover out it. She saw Giles actually flinch at the sound of the zipper and grinned inwardly.

'Yes well... well... I wasn't whining. I-I-I was grumbling.' Buffy chuckled a little, feeling much better now that she was rid of the soaking wet wool. She laid her pullover close to the fire, and decided to lose her bra as well. If Giles had noticed that she had laid it down next to her pullover, she hadn't been able to detect it. He was quite subtle when it came to showing any reaction whatsoever. Finally, Buffy kicked off her boots and pulled off her socks, letting out a long sigh of relief.

'Wow, those were really killing me.' She let out, before directing her sore toes towards the fire, to warm her feet up. She smiled and stretched on her sleeping bag like a cat, nearly purring at the simple pleasure of feeling her feet again.

'I told you those boots weren't made for climbing mountains,' he said, taking off his own. Buffy laughed a little and looked up at him.

'Jeez, you're quite Mr-Moralising-Man, aren't you?' She said, grinning broadly. Giles smiled back at her a little.

'Yes, well... Slayer, Watcher; stakes, books; you do the slaying, I do the research; you do the whining, I do the moralising. To each their own.' Buffy giggled, then unzipped the sleeping bag and rid herself of her soaked jeans before sliding inside. It was pure bliss compared to the sticky creasy mess she had been wearing before. She sat up in the bag and wriggled closer to the fire, laying out her trousers as she did so. She saw Giles do the same, and they smiled at each other, both of them curled up in their own little bag. Buffy wondered if she would be able to steal a glance of Giles. Or even take a big fat look. And would she get away with it? She grinned to herself and closed her eyes, imagining what she might see...

* * *

'Hey Giles,' said Buffy's voice, and he instantly woke up. He hadn't realised that he had been so tired; he'd actually dozed off as soon as he'd entered his sleeping bag. He shook his head a little, and felt for his glasses, that had fallen off his nose while he'd been sleeping. 

'Hm?' He asked, still a little dazed. He replaced his glasses and saw Buffy sitting up in her bag, close to the fire. She had probably kept it going while he slept. She smiled at him as he looked at her.

'Sorry I had to wake you. You did sleep a whole four hours, though.' Giles raised a brow, surprised. The fight with the demon and the walk up the mountain had really exhausted him, then.

'I-I really didn't know I was that tired... you did well to wake me,' he said, sitting up and wincing as he felt all his muscles ache.

'I also slept a little, but then the fire went down and I got cold, so I woke up,' she explained. Giles nodded faintly. 'I was wondering, you said you'd packed some food with you? I'm really starting to starve, here...' Giles smiled at her.

'Yes, I think we do have food for peckish Slayers somewhere... try the outer pocket of my rucksack,' he said, stretching his muscles carefully. Buffy immediately grabbed his bag and started to fumble with it. He heard the sound of a zipper coming down, and the Slayer got her hands on some crackly packets.

'All right! We have candy b...' Buffy stopped in her tracks all of a sudden, frowning. Giles looked at her quizzically. Buffy's expression shifted from surprised to sarcastic.

'Is something the matter?' He asked.

'Oh yay. You have packed...' she pulled handfuls of candy bars out of the bag. '... ten large, sweet, delicious, _cocorific_ candy bars. Guaranteed to make you become a teenager again.' She threw one at him, in a rather aggressive way. Giles caught it, and looked at the packet. It was band candy. The candy that Ethan had been handing out to make all the Sunnydale people as irresponsible as kids.

'Oh my God...' he mumbled. 'I can't believe this...' Buffy was glowering at him.

'So much for Brain Guy!' She said. 'Is that all you took along? Or did you add some bezoar eggs, maybe?' Giles grimaced a little and shook his head.

'I'm really sorry Buffy... I-I... well, it wasn't I who packed the food, actually.' Buffy looked at him intently.

'Who was it then? Ethan?' She snapped angrily. Giles let out a long sigh.

'Faith.' Buffy rolled her eyes. 'I-I... I was late getting all the weapons and the rest of my stuff ready, and I asked Faith to-to go to the cafeteria and find us some snacks to keep us going.' Buffy shook her head, let out a long, highly irritated sigh, and started to search the outer pockets thoroughly.

'Well, what else did Faith stuff into your bag? Booze? A rubber chicken? A goat? Condoms?' Buffy's hand came out with a handful of foil packets. 'Condoms.' Giles felt his face turn crimson.

'What on earth...' he murmured between his teeth, nearly shuddering with anger and embarrassment at the thought of what Faith had intended them to do, drugged with band candy... Buffy let out a sigh and stuffed the condoms back into the bag's pocket. Giles saw that she too had gone a rather dark shade of pink. She looked up at him and then they both averted their gaze, awkwardly.

'Well... well Faith really does know how to-to... make people uncomfortable, doesn't she?' Let out Giles softly, clearing his throat.

'Yeah,' replied Buffy very quietly. Giles felt his heart rate slow down to normal, as he tried to think of a solution to find something to eat. They did need something to keep their calories up, or else they'd just get frozen.

'Uh, Buffy, why don't you drink some tea for the time being, while I try to think of something?' Buffy nodded, and silently reached for the thermos flask. She was trembling. He frowned a little, not really understanding what was wrong with her. 'Are you all right?' He asked, concerned.

'Oh yeah, never better,' she replied evasively, pouring herself a cup of tea.

'But... you're trembling?' He insisted a little, though he hated to pry with her.

'Me?' She looked down at herself. 'Oh yeah, so I am. I think it's the cold.' Giles shrugged a little. The room was quite warm, compared to the temperature that it must have been outside, anyway. However, Buffy was from California, she wasn't used to these temperatures.

'You'd better drink up, then, it'll warm you a little,' he said gently. She nodded, and sipped some tea, then pulled a face.

'Let me guess,' she said. 'Faith made the tea?' Giles swallowed hard.

'What-what's wrong with it?' He asked worriedly.

'Nothing. Except that I'm not supposed to be drinking that kind of stuff before I turn 21.' Giles let out a long sigh and threw his head back.

'Really Buffy, I'm sorry. I don't know what got into Faith but... look there's no need to be embarrassed. It was her stupid idea; we're just her victims - and we didn't get caught in the prank she was trying to play on us.'

'She is so going to pay for this when we get back,' growled Buffy. Giles wasn't even sure that she had registered what he had just said, but he nodded.

'You know... it took at least ten candy bars until I really became... well, like an irresponsible teenager again. I'm pretty sure that if you have one or two, it should be all right... besides... it didn't have any effect on Xander...' Buffy let out a sigh.

'But what about you?' She asked. He smiled at her.

'I think I could stand losing a pound or two,' he replied. He hated to see the famished expression on her face and how her eyes were pitifully glued on the forbidden chocolate bars.

'Well, I guess...' She fingered a pack of candy, and took it into her hands.

'If ever you start doing anything stupid, I promise to stop you from eating more,' he said. She looked up at him and grinned.

'Yeah sure, Giles. As if you could...' she started to unwrap the paper from the candy, and took a bite. There was an expression of pure joy on her face. Giles smiled at it, even though his stomach was starting to grumble enviously.

'Well if you do get out of hand, I'll make you finish the spiked tea, and you'll sleep like a baby,' he said with a grin. Buffy laughed, chewing at the chocolate.

'Hey, I am a Slayer. I'm resistant to lots of things,' she said.

'I don't think that alcohol is one of them. I take it you got tipsy after one glass of champagne on New Year's and fell asleep under the Christmas tree.'

'I'm going to kill Xander for repeating that embarrassing episode to you,' she hissed, smacking her lips and rolling the empty candy wrapper into a ball before chucking it into the fire. Giles laughed a little, and his stomach growled again angrily.

'I think someone needs something to eat,' said Buffy with a smile.

'Yes, well I can't, can I?' replied Giles stiffly. 'I'm pretty sure I would quite quickly become completely... well, not me.' A pensive expression went over Buffy's face, then she looked back at Giles.

'Well, what could happen, in the worst of cases?' She asked. Giles grimaced. She really didn't have any idea of how lustful and provocative he had been when he was in his Ripper phase. He used to try anything out for a laugh or to challenge death.

'We could walk out into the snow and freeze to death?' offered Giles. Buffy shook her head.

'Unlikely. I hate the cold. If you tried to open that snow wall you made, I'd rip your head off.'

'Yes, of course, us killing each other - or rather, you killing me - is another scary possibility.' Buffy chuckled a little, and shook her head again.

'I don't think so. Even as Ripper you knew better than to push me too far, and besides I don't think that I'd ever be able to harm you that much, even if I was very drugged.' Giles smiled at her fondly. That was the sweetest thing she could say - although very untrue. She hadn't hesitated once before punching him in the face on several occasions. Oh, for his own good, of course, but she had ruthlessly done it all the same.

'I really don't think that I should, you know,' he replied quietly.

'Aw c'mon. You'll need some strength to walk back tomorrow and keep your body heat up for the night, and I really don't want to carry a frozen Watcher down the mountain.' Giles smiled a little at her. He should have known better, but he felt as if he were giving in. Her arguments made sense, really. Buffy handed him a candy bar, and he looked at the wrapper pensively.

'Well, I suppose... but look, I want you to promise to knock me out if I start making a fool of myself.' Buffy giggled.

'Did you actually _ask_ me to hit you? I mean, how bad a fool do you think you could be if you actually prefer being pummelled by a Slayer?' Giles frowned and let out a sigh.

'I... Ripper...' he sighed again, feeling the words getting caught in his throat and redness spreading from his ears to his cheeks. 'If I really become as I was in my Ripper years, it's-it's probable that I might try to... well...' he cleared his throat, thinking that being hit right now by his Slayer would be less painful than trying to explain to her that he already wanted her as Giles, and that Ripper had the same desires, mixed with a "see, want, take" policy.

'Giles, if it's going to be morning before you finish that sentence, I'd rather you'd just eat up.' Giles let out another sigh, and started to unwrap the chocolate bar, then broke it into pieces, nervously.

'It's just that you're... you're a really attractive girl, Buffy. And-and...' She smiled at him.

'All right, I get the picture. If you try to make a pass at me, I'll knock you out. Is that what you were trying to say?' she said. Giles smiled and sighed in relief.

'Yes. Thank you.' And he popped a piece of candy into his mouth, while Buffy opened another pack and also started to chew on more chocolaty goodness.

* * *

'I just don't get how it can be sunny all year long in Sunny-bloody-dale,' grumbled Giles, reclining against the cave's wall. He was sitting next to her now, and the candy bars were nothing more than a pile of empty paper and foil. 

'Well you're the brain guy; you're the one who knows about that kind of stuff,' let out Buffy, grinning at him. Damn, he was cute. She'd noticed that ever since they'd met, but now it was even more obvious. She was starting to have really fuzzy feelings about her Watcher, but worst of all, she didn't even feel ashamed anymore. That was something she hadn't expected the candy to do to her.

'I just can't believe that you can stand living in a place where the weather never changes. No rain, no clouds, no snow...'

'I think I can happily do without them, you know?' replied Buffy with a smile. He looked at her out of the corner of his eye.

'Yeah, and look where that puts you. A bit of cold weather, a couple of snowballs, and you're whining like a lost puppy, or catching pneumonia,' he snorted. Buffy put on an offended expression, and shoved his shoulder.

'Don't push me, candy or not, I can still kick your ass,' she replied.

'That's another thing you Americans do. Destroy the English language. "Candy"? Can't you say chocolate or sweets, like everyone else?'

'Everyone else in England, you mean?' Let out Buffy with a provocative smirk. Giles glared at her out of the corner of his eye. 'You know, I think we have you outnumbered,' she whispered in his ear. He turned to face her and smiled back at her. Their faces were so close that she suddenly felt a shudder go right through her. A warm, pleasant shudder. Ooh, bad, Buffy, bad... she bit her lip.

'But we're cleverer. Bloody colonials,' he added, his smile broadening. Buffy giggled and moved away from him, feeling a familiar tension start to spread from her stomach into her entire body.

'You're just bitter we got our independence,' she taunted in a singsong tone. Giles chuckled a little.

'And maimed our language,' he replied. 'But at least you give us something to complain about. After the weather, of course. You know, it's quite a hobby in England.' he added with a grin.

'I knew it, I knew you got a kick from telling your poor little Slayer off all the time!' Buffy pouted. 'I'm sure you actually find excuses to grumble at me whenever you can.' He smirked at her.

'And I'm sure you enjoy it, too,' he replied in a low growl. Buffy felt her heart falter at the sound of his voice. Hell, could he sound sexy when he wanted to! And she knew that he had told her to knock him out if he started to flirt with her, but she didn't want to. Instead, she decided to play coy, and looked away.

'Maybe I do. Maybe I don't. I guess you'll never know,' she replied playfully, throwing some twigs and a branch onto the fire.

'Women!' he hissed, rolling his eyes.

'Aw, there you go, I found you something else to groan about.' Giles' eyes met hers as she said it. Buffy felt as if electricity was crackling between them. His expression was incredibly wicked, and dangerously seductive.

'It's not the same kind of groaning,' he replied softly. Oh his lips, God she wanted to kiss those lips now... Angel, think of Angel. Maybe that would calm her down a bit. But she was really unable to focus on anything else than... Giles. Fortunately, he slowly pulled his gaze away from hers, and Buffy was relieved. There was still Giles somewhere inside him, trying to get a grip over himself and put his Ripper impulses into check. And there was still her Conscience somewhere deep down, badly buried in band candy, but still crying out that they should stop, that they would regret it in the morning, and that if Giles had asked her to put an end to his seduction moves, there was probably a good reason. But why was she _always_ the one who was supposed to stay responsible and good?

'Look Giles, we'd better... why don't we try to sleep a bit?' Sleep, yes, good idea. Maybe that would help relieve a bit of the tension between them. And then she could dream, and he could dream, but in separate sleeping bags. Buffy took a deep breath, trying to cool off a little.

'I suppose it's a good idea. But what about the fire?' muttered Giles.

'Good point, we don't want it going out,' she said. 'Unless we want to become Popsicles during the night.' Giles grinned wickedly as she said the word.

'I _don't_ want to hear what you're gonna say,' Buffy snapped as sternly as she could, raising a hand towards him. His grin faded down to a smirk, but mischief still glimmered in his eyes.

'So, do we take turns keeping the fire up?' he finally asked. Buffy was relieved that he had dropped whatever dirty joke he was about to say about Popsicles.

'You already slept four hours,' she pointed out.

'All right, then it's your turn.' Buffy nodded, and curled herself up in the sleeping bag, closing her eyes. Now she just had to forget that they were both in a cave, beside a fire, high on band candy and both obviously horny. Suddenly, a shiver went through her, and then she sneezed. Repeatedly. Cool, now she was catching a cold. Well, at least, that wasn't anything like sexy.

'Darn, I hate the cold!' She growled. Giles burst out laughing in the background. 'Shut up, Giles!' She snapped. He did. And then he came towards her, still tucked in his sleeping bag, like a giant snake sliding to her.

'I think you need to be warmed up,' he said. Before she could protest, he had unzipped his jacket and was wrapping it around her shoulders. Buffy could only gaze in shock. She was seeing more of Giles than she had ever dared to imagine. His muscular shoulders and arms, the greying down on his chest... she closed her eyes, trying to refrain from moaning with desire and frustration combined. He was in his sleeping bag, wearing nothing but his underwear... at least, she thought that he had underwear... did he? She hit herself mentally for putting that kind of picture into her mind. God she was going to kill Faith when she got her hands on her, this candy was really making her lose all control over herself.

'There, better?' asked Giles softly.

'Uh... ah...' was all she could let out as a sign of gratitude, her eyes half covered with her long lashes, but not enough to stop her from seeing his flesh, his smile, and the incredibly sexy expression in his eyes.

'You're welcome,' he replied with a smirk. 'Besides, you're now able to take on my traditional role, and watch.' She tried to glare at him, but her pathetic attempt at looking angry just came out as an expression that pleaded for him to stop. His smile simply broadened and he came closer to her. She thanked Heaven that she was so tightly wrapped in both his and her jacket, because the feeling of his hand on her shoulder would have driven her crazy otherwise.

'Giles...' she started, and swallowed hard, hypnotised by the fire that was reflected in his eyes.

'You know, if you're still cold, the Eskimos really do share a lot of body heat. And two sleeping bags are warmer than one...' She stared at him, feeling her body vibrating through and through with desire for him, for those lips, for those strong arms... she tried to shake the ideas out of her mind, but one of his hands swept across her cheek, gently.

'Giles, please don't...' she squeaked.

'Don't you want to?' he murmured into her ear. Stupid man, wasn't it obvious? Wasn't her breathing laboured enough or her face flushed enough for him to notice?

'You told me to... to stop you, if you tried to...' she managed to spit out. He continued to stare meaningfully at her, his face only inches away from hers, his breath warm against her lips.

'That wasn't the question I asked,' he murmured, his lips coming closer to hers. Buffy could only let out a small moan, between protest and surrender. She wanted him so badly that her body was trembling and her stomach fluttering with desire. All she could think about right now were those lips, which slowly came closer and closer, closing in on her. They finally brushed against hers, drawing another low moan out of her throat. For a moment, they remained completely still; there was only the warmth of his lips against hers, of his breath on her skin. Then he slowly kissed her, superficially, with tantalising lightness. He repeated the movement again and again, before delicately slipping the tip of his tongue over the edge of her lips, to part them. Buffy didn't resist anymore, she let his mouth close over hers, suck her lower lip into its warmth, slowly, sensually. His tongue found its way inside, and she felt sparks flash down her spine when it started to probe and play with hers. She was so concentrated on the delicious kiss that she hardly noticed Giles slipping one arm behind her shoulders and the other around her bust, claiming her into his embrace, and taking complete possession of her, and of her mouth.

Buffy broke the kiss after what seemed like instants and an eternity all at once. Her breath was ragged and fast. This was so good, all she knew now was that she wanted more, and that Giles was going to give her just that.

* * *

Buffy held him tight in her arms, pressing her face to his chest and intertwining her thighs with his. She felt his strong arms close over her, as he pulled her on top of him, and then covered them both with the two sleeping bags. Buffy showered his chest and throat with small kisses, as he did with her hair and forehead. Finally, she looked up at him, and smiled. 

'Wow,' she murmured. He grinned at her smugly.

'I know,' he replied, and kissed her lips gently.

'Bighead,' she retorted, kissing him back harder. He chuckled playfully.

'Well, at least we know a way to avoid freezing to death,' he whispered. She grinned broadly.

'Because you intend to start again?' She asked, provocatively raising an eyebrow.

'Because you don't?' He replied, and their lips met again in a deep kiss, full of satisfaction and promise for the night to come.


	3. Consequences

CHOCOLATE ICE  
a _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_ fanfic  
by Viv

Pairing: Buffy/Giles  
Rating: T to M (this is an edited version of an adult story - for the complete version, please go to the Buffy/Giles section of www .neptunienne. net)  
Feedback: Please! Constructive comments and criticism are very welcome  
Disclaimer: All characters mentioned in this story belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox Television, etc. The story is written for the pleasure of the author and readers, and has no lucrative purpose whatsoever. Please don't reproduce this story anywhere without the author's consent.  
Notes: The story starts out in Season 3, after "Helpless", but before "Bad Girls". This story is a response to Julia on the Buffy/Giles ML, which required Buffy and Giles getting snowed in somewhere and smoochiness ensuing.

**Part 2: Consequences**

Warmth surrounded him, and, very unusually, he felt happy as he awoke. Normally, he wasn't a morning person, and he grumbled a lot until he had taken a shower and downed a couple of coffees. But today was different, and his foggy brain dimly wondered why. He slowly opened his eyes, seeing a faint light enter the room. It took a moment for his sleep-dazed brain to remember that he and Buffy had been forced to sleep in a cave, stranded in the middle of nowhere, in the snow. It took another while for him to work out why he felt so warm and happy.

'Good Lord!' he gasped quietly. Buffy was lying against his chest, hugging him close. He could feel her breasts against his skin. And now that his memory came flooding back with the morning sun, he remembered the events of the previous night... the taste of her skin, the smell of her body, the vision of her naked, the sound of her climaxing in his arms - it had been the band candy, again. His initial happiness was quickly replaced with anger, and sadness. So, Faith had been able to con them into it, after all. Gently, he pushed Buffy off his chest, and pulled himself out from under the covers, to get dressed. How had she let him do that to her? He grabbed his trousers from the floor, deciding that to retrieve his boxer shorts, wherever they might have landed, would just be too complicated. With an angry sigh, he pulled his trousers on, shivering at their clammy feel against his skin. He cast a glance at Buffy, who was still sleeping on the ground, smiling sweetly. Old fool, how could he have given in to temptation like this? He distinctly remembered suddenly deciding to try his luck with her... and the stupid, stupid girl hadn't pushed him away. Hadn't he asked her to stop him? How was he going to face her now? How was he going to look at her every day and pretend it hadn't ever happened, and that he didn't want it to happen again? He let out a sigh, closing his eyes tight. No, he wasn't going to cry. But the frustration he felt right now made him want to. Instead, he slipped his shirt on, finding it to be mercifully dry. He picked up his woollen pullover - which was still soggy - and pulled it on as well. Giles sighed deeply, gazing down at Buffy. She looked contented now, but what would she say when she woke up? How would she handle it? How would he handle her reaction? Even more than anger, now, it was terror that gripped his heart. Oh God, what had they done?

Buffy blinked, and stretched in the sleeping bag. A puzzled expression passed over her face. Giles watched her from the other side of the room, immobile, scared that if he moved, she would be frightened like a wild animal and run away. Buffy looked around her, and then her eyes stopped on him. Giles wondered if his heart had stopped. There was complete silence for a moment, as they both stared at each other.

'Hey,' said Buffy with a confused look on her face. He averted his gaze.

'Hello, Buffy,' he let out in a murmur. He shuddered, knowing that he couldn't face her, that he couldn't look at her anymore. There was another very uncomfortable silence. Giles wished that he'd just drop dead, rather than undergo this torture. What Angelus had done to him didn't come anywhere close to how difficult this situation was.

'Giles, are you okay?' She asked, finally. Oh no, not with the worried tone. She got him every time with that one - he couldn't resist it.

'I-I-I...' Giles took in a deep breath, then forced himself to look at her. 'I'd told you to knock me out,' he stated plainly. It was Buffy's turn to look away, ashamed.

'I guess the candy had the better of me, huh...' she mumbled. Giles shook his head.

'Well... I-I suppose that we-we... can't blame ourselves for this... it wasn't the-the worst thing we could end up doing.' He wasn't looking at her either anymore. It was hard for him to say it like this. As if it had been a stupid mistake. But telling her that it was what he had been longing for during the last two years would only make things worse. More complicated and probably more repulsive for her.

'I... I guess.' Buffy's voice was low, and somewhat sad. God, he hoped that she didn't think that he had taken advantage of her. They were both in an altered state, but he should have known better. He was responsible for her.

'I... I suppose the best would be to... forget about it... we-we weren't ourselves last night and-and it would have never happened... under normal circumstances,' he forced himself to say. To forget about it? How could he ever forget? But sometimes denial helped, in her case, maybe... maybe that could make her feel better about it.

'Huh,' replied Buffy, her voice absent. She sounded in shock. He gritted his teeth, feeling that she wasn't coping with the situation at all, just as he had feared.

'Buffy... I... I'm really sorry,' he offered, managing to fix his gaze on her again. She looked up at him and glared angrily.

'So am I,' she replied quietly. Then she reached out for her clothes. Giles averted his gaze from her naked body. The sight of her really wouldn't help. Even if they had made love - had sex, it was sex, nothing more - three times during the night, he didn't seem to have quite got his fill of her. He gritted his teeth. Dirty old man he was. She thought that he loved her like a father, how the hell could she understand that it wasn't the case?

'So, are you gonna help me pack these sleeping bags or what?' asked Buffy harshly. Giles nodded and knelt down to roll the bags up as neatly as he could, although his hands trembled dramatically. He felt that already their relationship was going down the drain. For one night of pleasure, he had managed to alienate her completely and maybe forever. He bit his lip to refrain from crying.

'Your glasses,' snapped Buffy, chucking them on the ground next to him. He gingerly picked them up, ignoring the scrapes on the lenses. Buffy was busy stuffing the sleeping bags into the backpacks. She was punching them in a little harder than necessary.

'Right... are we... all set to go?' asked Giles, looking around the room once more. With his glasses on, he could see the discarded condoms and their wrappers littering the cave ground, but he didn't want to make any comment. Things were difficult enough without the awkwardness of picking up proofs of what they had done last night.

'Guess so. I'm off.' Buffy broke down the snow wall, viciously attacking it, kicking it, until it crumbled into pieces on the ground. She trampled it as she exited the cave and walked away. Giles watched her for a moment, shocked by how angry she seemed to be with him. He didn't know what to say to make things better. God how could he have been so stupid? He heaved the backpack onto his shoulders and followed Buffy out into the bright snow outside. At least now, if his eyes watered, he could accuse the glow of the sun off the brilliant white coat.

They walked for an hour or so, at least twenty yards separating them at all times. Giles often wanted to ask her to stop, to look at him, to punch him if she wanted to, but at least to say something. Her anger was obvious. Maybe she was just too disgusted and shocked to speak to him right now - if ever. He closed his eyes. He had thought that the worst he could ever do was to betray her by making her take part in the Cruciamentum. That had only been a few weeks back. But it looked like a picnic in comparison to how much she seemed to hate him right now. He felt that he had broken something between them, by crossing the line of the Watcher to become her lover. And he had made her be unfaithful to Angel. He gritted his teeth, unable to refrain from accusing himself for everything that had happened that night, from telling himself that he had been a selfish bastard who had taken advantage of a drugged girl. He knew that it was only partially true, but as long as she refused to speak to him, it was the only thing he was able to do.

They arrived to the pine forest that separated them from the town, where they still had rooms in a hotel - rooms that they wouldn't ever use. Buffy stopped, allowing Giles to catch up with her. When he arrived within a few yards of her, she swirled around. He caught his breath. Her expression was furious and hurt, and her face was literally drowned with tears. Oh God... it was even worse than he thought.

'How could you?' She nearly whispered. Giles simply looked at her, unable to answer. There was no measly excuse that would ever pacify her - he knew at least that. She furiously strode up to him. 'How could you?' She yelled at him this time. He lowered his gaze.

'I... I didn't... want to hurt you,' was the only pathetic reply that came out of his lips. She laughed hysterically.

'You didn't want to hurt me? Giles, do you realise what you're doing to me? Do you even understand how I feel?' He managed to look up at her again.

'Anger... pain... I also do. I suppose you also feel disgusted...' he murmured.

'Disgusted? That doesn't cover it! I can't believe that you'd react like this! How could you... how could you...' she broke off, unable to say the words. Giles closed his eyes hard, and felt tears roll down his cheeks this time. He had hurt her now, terribly. And he suffered with her. 'How could you treat me like this, Giles? After what happened last night? What do you think I am, a whore?' Giles opened his eyes, bewildered. He hadn't been expecting her to say that. He thought that she was going to call him a pervert and a molester. He stared at her, feeling helpless, unable to understand what she was saying.

'Buffy, I...' he started, with absolutely no idea of what he would say next. He trailed off, and simply looked at her. She gritted her teeth.

'Am I cursed or something? Is there like a prophecy in one of your goddamn books that says that every time someone sleeps with the Slayer, he's going to treat her like shit in the morning?' He could just gaze in awe, unable to find any words.

'Do you know what Angelus said to me after our night together? Do you have any idea?' she shrieked at him. Oh God... of course, Angelus... how could he have been so insensitive? He had instinctively reacted as if she'd push him away, and hadn't even thought of the possibility... that at least, she needed some affection. He was about to open his mouth, but she interrupted him.

'I trusted you,' her tone was soft and low, and more tears ran down her cheeks. 'I thought that whatever happened between us, it would be okay, because I felt safe with you. Well, I was mistaken.'

Before Giles could answer back, she ran away. He stared at her, feeling empty and totally stupid. Was it possible for him to be more clueless? He had put his personal insecurity first and hadn't thought of her once...

'Pillock,' he muttered to himself, shaking his head angrily. Then he went after her into the woods, as fast as he could, hoping that it wasn't too late to right the wrong he had done.

* * *

He spotted their hotel, which was a small, homely wooden building in the centre of the town, and forced himself to make the last dozen of yards towards it. He felt exhausted, emotionally and physically. During the whole walk back, he had tried to give a meaning to all these events. One thing he was sure of is that he had desired and loved her before he had eaten the candy, and that it had only uninhibited him, taken the edge off the high moral standards that had stopped him from doing anything inappropriate with her in normal times. It had dawned on him that maybe Buffy had the same feelings... at least attraction... that she had refused to admit to consciously, or act upon. He hadn't even taken this possibility in account, at first. He had panicked blindly, as usual, when confronted to any difficult situation involving women. But at least, the walk home had given him time to think a little about what he was going to say to her. He wasn't going to let his own awkwardness ruin their relationship. Giles entered the hotel, and asked for the key to his room at the counter. 

'Oh, you're with the young lady who just came in earlier?' asked the tenant, a chubby man with a good-natured face.

'I... yes,' Giles sighed with relief. She had arrived safely. He had been worried that she might get lost, or take a bus home as soon as she arrived in town, instead of going back to the hotel.

'You didn't come in last night, did you?' asked the tenant, handing him the key.

'No-no actually we-we got snowed in, we had to sleep in a cave.' The man facing him raised his eyebrows with surprise. 'Fortunately we had sleeping bags and were able to make a fire,' explained Giles.

'Well you guys were lucky, you could have frozen to death up there. I bet you're starving, too. Do you want me to bring you breakfast in your rooms?' Giles nodded approvingly.

'Yes, that would be very kind of you,' he replied.

'You get yourself warmed up, I'll have your food ready soon,' he said. Giles nodded, and climbed the stairs - a torture of its own kind, considering his sore muscles - to access his room. It was situated just next to Buffy's. He sighed and entered, letting his bag fall onto the ground and ridding himself of his soaked clothes. Fortunately, they had taken a change of clothes with them, thinking that they might have to stay up there for more than one night. Once undressed, he dragged himself to the shower and set it on at full blast. Steam soon filled the room, and he smiled a little as the hot water covered his skin, warming him up from the outside, even though he felt very cold within. He still wasn't sure of what to tell her, of how much he could allow himself to reveal. He wondered if she herself knew exactly how she felt, but somehow, he doubted it. Giles reached for the soap. Although he didn't really want to wash away her scent from his skin, he remembered having touched some ice demon mucus and he didn't want to keep _that_ kind of souvenir for long.

He was pulling a warm cream sweater over a pair of navy corduroy trousers, when somebody knocked on the door. He opened to the tenant, who was carrying a large platter decked with food. Giles smiled.

'Thank you so much,' he said, gesturing the man to put the platter down onto the bed. There were pancakes, toast, rolls, a couple of boiled eggs, butter, jam and various pots containing hot drinks.

'No problem. You want me to go and fetch missy next door?' Giles shook his head.

'No, I'll bring it to her. Thank you.' The man nodded and smirked a little.

'Lovers' tiff?' Giles felt himself go crimson.

'No!' He exclaimed. 'No, we're not...' But yes, they were, he thought. It was a strange, even disturbing, but equally pleasant thought to him. However, this wasn't any of the man's business.

'Whatever. She just looked upset,' he commented. Giles nodded.

'I know, I'll go and see if... she wants any breakfast,' he muttered, slightly resenting the inquisitive tenant at this point. Fortunately, the man soon exited, leaving Giles alone with the platter of food. Now, he was going to have to work hard, in order to get the angry Slayer to accept to speak with him. After a moment, he took a deep breath, collected the tray carefully, and made his way to her room. Summoning up all his courage, he knocked. There was no answer, so he knocked again, harder.

'Go away,' he heard her growl from the other side of the door. He let out a long sigh.

'Buffy, it's me,' he said gently, leaning his head against the wood of the door.

'And I'd let _you_ in why?' she snapped from the other side of the door. Her voice was close enough for him to guess that she too was standing there. Only the wood separated them.

'Because... because I need to talk to you. Sort things out... properly,' he said, another surge of anger against himself for being so stupid rising in his stomach.

'What, like make me sign a contract saying that I won't sue you for having sex with me while I was drugged?' she snapped back aggressively. He winced.

'No! Of course not!' He hissed. 'Look Buffy, please let me in.' There was silence on the other side of the door. 'Please, Buffy...' he murmured into the wood. 'I don't want things to be like this between us. At least give me a chance to explain myself.' Giles thought that he heard her sigh, but it could have been his imagination.

'I don't feel like talking right now,' she mumbled sulkily. He rolled his eyes, knowing that the longer they waited, the more estranged they would become.

'But I have breakfast for you,' he said, suddenly recalling that Buffy's stomach tended to have a will of its own. He heard her grumble something from the other side of the door. 'They even made pancakes... they'll be ruined if we let them get cold,' he coaxed. Finally, he heard the key turn in the lock, and she opened the door, glaring at him angrily. They looked at each other for a moment. Buffy's hair was wet and curly, and her eyes were still puffy. She was wearing a pink woollen pullover, which was slightly too long on the sleeves, over a pair of jeans. He couldn't help but admire her... even at what she would consider her worst, she was lovely.

'You have one minute,' she said threateningly, and gestured him in. He entered, feeling his heart start to beat so violently that it seemed to be in his throat. He swallowed hard and placed the tray down onto the dresser. He felt Buffy standing behind him. Her gaze could have bore holes into the back of his head. Finally, he managed to turn and look at her.

'Buffy...' he started, trying to collect all this thoughts and be coherent. 'I think...' he looked away from her gaze, it was too charged with anger and resentment for him to bear. He took in a deep breath. 'I-I-I was... foolish and-and awkward this morning,' he managed to spit out.

'That's kind of an understatement,' she commented coolly.

'Agreed. But-but it's a misunderstanding,' he continued shakily. 'I-I didn't... I panicked. I was frightened.' She rolled her eyes and let out an exasperated sigh.

'Yeah, I get it, sex with your Slayer, how terrible. You're a bad, bad man, Rupert Giles, you ought to get spanked for taking advantage of a High School girl! Is that it?' He looked up at her and glared a little.

'No, it isn't,' he replied quietly and firmly. She looked away, as if she was suddenly nervous. 'I... I assumed that once you realised what we had done, you would be disgusted and wouldn't want me to... well, stay anywhere near you. That you'd prefer to forget all about it.' She stared at him, disbelief in her eyes.

'Who do you think I am? Some kind of moron? God, why do you have to always treat me like I'm a kid!' she shouted at him.

'Because I'm afraid!' he shouted back at her, irritated by the situation. Her mouth stayed open in surprise at the sudden surge of passion in his voice. 'I'm afraid of losing you... as my Slayer... as a friend. So... so, like an idiot...' he sighed.

'You did exactly the opposite of what I wanted you to do, because you thought that it was best,' she finished his sentence for him, crossing her arms over her chest.

'Yes,' he sighed, looking at her. Buffy lowered her head and sighed too.

'You're just a great big jerk, you know that?' she muttered. He nodded.

'Yes, I'm aware of that, I've been repeating it to you for the last five minutes as I recall, and to myself ever since I realised that I'd got it all wrong.' She shook her head a little, and went to sit down on the bed. He followed her there, and squatted in front of her.

'I really didn't mean to upset you,' he said to her, gently. He was straining to hold back the words that he wanted to say but didn't dare to. 'The... night we spent together, it means a lot to me. You mean a lot to me.' Everything. She meant everything to him. But he couldn't say that to her face. Buffy let out a sigh.

'Yeah... you too,' she muttered. 'I guess being English is your excuse for being stuffy and clueless and all that. I can't really hold it against you.'

'Well thank you very much,' let out Giles in mock offence. She smirked at him, and he smiled back a little.

'Do you want some breakfast?' he asked finally. She smiled.

'Yeah. You know that a hungry Slayer is a cranky Slayer,' she said. He chuckled a little.

'I'd rather not know what an already cranky Slayer becomes when she gets hungry,' he said, getting up to fetch the platter and bring it on the bed. They both turned out to be ravenous and cleaned off the tray quickly, eating all the toast, eggs, rolls and pancakes, and emptying a pot of hot cocoa. The whole time, they remained silent, Giles still lost in his thoughts about what had happened the previous night, and Buffy just enjoying the delicious food. He wondered how he would be able to keep his hands off her, now that they had slept together. How he'd manage to control and hide his desire for her. Already now, just watching her devour her food was making him warm inside. He frowned a little, putting his mug back onto the platter.

'Wow, I needed that,' said Buffy, lying back on her bed, rubbing her belly a little.

'Ditto,' he replied laconically. He felt her eyes on him and turned to look at her, raising a questioning brow.

'I still haven't forgiven you, you know,' she growled, pouting. He grimaced.

'I haven't forgiven myself, so don't worry about that,' he muttered in return.

'I'd like to talk about it,' said Buffy. Giles felt warmth and redness spread from his ears to his cheeks, burning his skin.

'W-w-well of... of course, I... if that's what you want...' he managed to stutter. She nodded a little.

'Hey, it's not going to be easy for me either. It is kinda embarrassing. But if we don't clear the air...'

'Yes... I know, Buffy, you're right,' he said, nodding. She nodded too, then sat up at the head of the bed, and patted the pillow next to her, inviting him to come closer. He put the tray down onto the ground and hesitantly came to sit by her. They both gazed straight ahead, instead of at each other. It was easier that way.

'I don't know about you, Giles, but... for me, the candy just brought out...' she hesitated a long while. 'I've always found you attractive, I guess,' she said, finally. It took a while for that information to sink into Giles' mind. She had just turned eighteen, she was beautiful, she could have any man she wanted... and she was attracted to a stuffy middle-aged librarian?

'That... certainly comes as a surprise...' he murmured, then smiled a little. 'I-I... last time someone your age referred to me as cute, I recall that your opinion about it was "eew".' She chuckled a little.

'I do have a reputation to preserve!' she protested. 'I mean... lusting over the school librarian... it's not really the kind of thing I want people to know about me.'

'Well thank you very much,' replied Giles, this time genuinely a little hurt. Buffy grimaced slightly.

'Sorry, I know, it's shallow, but...' she trailed off and shrugged.

'But you're eighteen an obsessed with what other people will say and think of you?' supplied Giles, smiling a little.

'Something like that,' she replied. 'Besides, I'm still angry with you, and this is payback,' she gave him a little glare.

'I suppose I'm going to pay for the rest of my life, aren't I?' he asked wearily, actually feeling very happy to be the victim of her revenge, rather than being ignored by her.

'Nah, just until you retire,' she replied coolly. 'But maybe you can find some way to make me sweet again sooner.' She flickered a small grin a him, and all he could do was gaze in adoration. He blinked, trying to snap out of that state.

'W-w-well it depends... what-what do you have in-in... mind?' Buffy pouted pensively for a moment, staring at the ceiling.

'You could start by being honest and telling me... well, what I told you,' she said.

'I-I'm not sure I understand... what... what exactly it is that you want me to tell you,' he said, taking his glasses off and polishing them with his handkerchief, nervously. Buffy let out a sigh.

'You're really dense sometimes, you know?' she growled at him. Giles pulled a small face.

'Yes, well... I'm English, after all,' he replied humourlessly.

'How about... telling me if you already... well, liked me. Before the candy.' Giles felt himself blush, and he put his glasses back onto his nose. A long, deep scratch ran through the left lens, and he could rub as much as he wanted, it wouldn't go away. Just like what had happened last night. Nothing would make him forget it.

'I-I...' he swallowed hard. 'Yes, Buffy. Of course I did... how couldn't I?' he asked, looking down at her. She smiled a little, obviously flattered.

'Since when?' she asked, looking up at him, her eyes bright with curiosity and what seemed like affection. Giles looked away from her, feeling very embarrassed by the question.

'A while... a long time...' he answered quietly.

'When, Giles?' she insisted, but he remained silent. 'Cause I know when I first found you attractive.' He looked up at her, raising an eyebrow. 'But I asked the question first,' she added forcefully.

'Well... fair enough,' he finally said, giving in. 'It was... well... at the Bronze.' Buffy frowned a little.

'You were never at the Bronze with us, apart when we were rescuing people from vampires and that doesn't really... oh.' She stopped and blushed a little. 'That first night at the Bronze,' she murmured.

'W-w-well... yes. I-I don't think you realise... to which extent you're... attractive,' he stuttered, picturing the scene again. Buffy leaning against the railing, and him coming up to her, to speak into her ear. It had seemed a good idea at the time, to avoid shouting over the loud music of the band. He had been close, so very close, feeling the heat off her skin, smelling the scent of her perfume, of her hair, of her skin. His body had irrepressibly responded to those sensations, to her provocative and playful personality, to everything that she was, really. Giles looked away from her, but he felt that they were both blushing wildly now that his secret was out.

'Wow, who'd have thought,' she said quietly, breaking the silence. 'Those slutty skirts did have an effect on someone, then, I guess.' Giles let out a little chuckle.

'Yes, well... I don't think that I was the only to have noticed that.' Buffy let out a sigh.

'Yeah sure, everyone thinks I'm fast,' she replied flatly. Giles gazed at her in surprise, then shook her head.

'No, Buffy that's absolutely not what I meant!' She looked at him with an irritated expression on her face.

'Of course it is. I don't expect the guys who lust over me to actually like me as a person. It's about looks, that's all. I mean, look at how many guys _Cordelia_ managed to get hooked up with.' He stared at her, appalled.

'Bu-Buffy... that was absolutely not what I meant when I said that I was attracted to you. I-I've seen many a pretty girl in the library. Cordelia... or-or Faith, for instance...' Buffy's face obviously darkened when she heard the name of her two rivals, the other Prom Queen and the other Slayer. 'But-but... I don't feel attracted to them as I do to you... you-you're very... special to me.' She gave him a wry smile.

'That's cute, Giles, always the gentleman,' she said softly. 'But I'm not sure I can believe you on that.' Giles let out an exasperated sigh.

'Look, I'm sorry if teenage boys just think of girls as a pretty package, but I've been there, done that, and am well past that phase by now,' he answered sharply, losing his patience. She looked at him, a little surprised.

'Wow, Giles,' she smiled. 'Do you still have band candy in your system or something?' He glared at her a little.

'Aren't I allowed to defend my opinions vehemently without being under the influence of a drug or what-not?' he grumbled. She didn't seem to have sussed out that aspect of his personality. The fact that under the cool surface, his passions ran deep and strong.

'You don't often go into angry-mode. It's usually stuffy-librarian-with-a-bug-up-his-butt mode, its not the same thing,' she answered, her lips still curled in a smile.

'Well, I can't suffer anyone selling you short... and that means not even you,' he answered with a quiet intensity, knowing that his gaze on her was more passionate than he'd wanted it to be. She actually blushed a little and looked away.

'Okay, so... if it isn't just about sex... what is it about?' she asked hesitantly. He felt himself go cold at the question. She had very cleverly cornered him into this situation. He wondered if she hadn't actually done it on purpose, said those things in order to make him reveal what really was in his heart.

'I... it... isn't it time I asked you an embarrassing question? You've been torturing me for ages,' he said, trying to change the subject.

'As I remember, you admitted that you were a jerk and agreed to pay for it, and that's just what you're doing right now,' she replied, jabbing a finger into his flank. He groaned a little, looking elsewhere. Actually, he felt comfortable with her, even as she tortured him. A little too comfortable, really. Enough to forget part of his inhibitions. And this always contained the risk of him letting something inadvertently slip.

'All right, all right...' replied Giles, sighing. 'It's about...' he let out a sigh and felt at loss with words, then looked up at her. 'It's difficult... won't you please help me with this?' he asked gently. Buffy rolled her eyes and sighed.

'And they say that women are the weaker sex,' she replied with a little smile, which he reciprocated. There was a moment of silence, but she remained turned towards him, her shoulder against his. 'I guess it was a lot about sex. You know... to be dating a vampire with a soul is really... frustrating.' Giles nodded, feeling his heart sink a little. Well, that put an end to _those_ romantic illusions, anyway. 'But... if I'd been stuck in that cave with anyone else than you, I don't think that I'd have... reacted like I did.'

'Why not?' he asked softly. 'After all, I'm sure I'm not in your top-ten heartthrobs,' he added, a little sarcastically. Buffy giggled.

'How would you know that? Besides, it's not about being a heartthrob. It's...' she hesitated a moment, while he watched her. 'Well, I already told you this. I trust you...' she seemed to be searching for words. 'I guess, I thought that you couldn't ever do anything to hurt me... somehow... that you'll always take care of me, do me... good.' Giles smiled at her, but sadness was mixed into it. He knew it could never be. All he could do was give her his love and support without asking anything in return.

'That... pretty much sums up how I feel about it, too,' he replied quietly. 'Although I'd have rather preferred to... do you good, as you put it... in a different way... or under different circumstances. The idea of... of making love to you under the influ...'

'Of what?' asked Buffy suddenly, interrupting him. Giles could have kicked himself. As he'd feared, it had slipped out eventually. He had been too relaxed around her and that was the result. How stupid could he be?

'Of-of...' he stuttered, stubbornly looking away from her, towards the window. He could feel shivers go through him, and his hands had started to tremble.

'Did you say "making love"?' she murmured. 'I... I thought...'

'It-it... it's just a-a-a figure of...' Giles stopped himself, gritting his teeth. 'Oh to hell with it, yes, I did say "making love". Only we didn't, did we, we had sex, and that's all,' he snapped, finally. It hurt to say it, and it was terrifying to think that the words he had just pronounced were giving his feelings away. But he couldn't lie to her anymore. It had to come out one day or another, and this time she would have to deal with it.

There was a long silence while she registered the information. She had been furious with him for being insensitive with her this morning, and now he was admitting that he loved her. At least, she thought so. He sounded pretty upset by the fact that it had just been sex between them. Now he'd gone quiet, and was staring out of the window. It was snowing again. They were both sitting on her comfortable bed in a mountain resort's hotel, looking at the snow slowly fall, outside. Now all they were missing was a fire burning in the fireplace, and it would be the perfect romantic setting. Actually, it would be the exact setting of her Anywhere But Here fantasy. Gee, Faith had been right, in the end. Except that it was Giles next to her, not Keanu Reeves. And that he had just admitted that he had more than just affection for her. God, she didn't know what to do or say. She felt a whole lot of things at this moment, such as her heart drumming a wild beat in her chest, and her throat knotting closed so that she could hardly speak. There was also a numbingly warm feeling that filled her head, and her chest, and her stomach. She couldn't understand what all these sensations and thoughts meant, and they just went waltzing around in her mind without any order whatsoever.

She remembered when Xander had asked her out, and how different she had felt then. She had been so absolutely sure that there was no way she'd ever fall in love with him. It had been a cold creeping sensation that had ran all the way down her spine, because she knew that she was going to have to hurt him, because she couldn't return the same feelings. There had been a sharp little burning on her temples, caused by the dread of having to turn a good friend down. And also, a chill in the pit of her stomach, for Willow, who loved Xander and who was as usual being unkindly pushed aside. And now, the situation was similar. But she felt completely different. Because it was Giles, because she did love him already... but not in that way, not as a potential boyfriend. No, of course not, and that's why they absolutely hadn't done what couples do, the previous night; that's also why she had never, ever, fantasised about him when she felt lonely and horny. Buffy grimaced a little, looking at Giles again. She could only see a small sliver of his face: his sharp cheekbone and chin, his dark curls, his broad shoulders and torso. He sure was a hunk of burning yumminess, as she had once indirectly told him, pretending it had been Jenny's words. Ever since he had saved her from Amy Madison's mother, she had seen his potential for being brave and therefore very sexy.

But what about Angel? She was in love with him, real bad. And it hurt, which gave it the edge that made her obsess over him just this little bit more. She shook her head, feeling terribly confused by now. There was no way she was ever going to leave Angel. No way that she was going to tell him about her escapade with Giles, either. But she still wanted her Watcher, even more since he had kissed her, slipped his fingers over her body, made her squirm between his hands... she shut her thoughts up, right away. It was unfair for Giles. She'd practically told him that she'd needed sex the previous night because she was so frustrated by _another man_, and then she'd taken for granted that he'd deal with it, and help her feel better. Selfish much. There was more to it than that, and somehow she had to let him know. She didn't want to hurt him, and she felt that he was already aching badly right now. Slowly, she reached out and touched his shoulder. He twitched nervously under her hand, but didn't turn around.

'Giles, I don't know what to say,' she murmured gently.

'You needn't say anything,' he replied in a low voice. Buffy squeezed his shoulder gently, then started to rub his back. He let out a sigh.

'When you said "making love", you really did mean... love?' she murmured.

'Yes,' he answered, his voice slightly hoarse. 'Yes, I did. I-I didn't mean to-to actually admit that to you... sorry,' he added.

'I'm the one who's sorry,' she said guiltily. 'As usual I was so wrapped up into myself and my own little worries that I didn't see what you were feeling.' He let out a small sigh.

'I'd been doing my best to hide it,' he replied. 'I know that you don't feel the same.' His back was still turned to her.

'Giles, look at me, please,' she whispered. After a moment of silence, he obeyed. Seeing his face again sent a shiver down her spine. His green eyes were so intense when they met hers, just like the previous night. And, surely enough, they were creating the same response in her body - no need for candy, this time. For a moment, they remained silent, looking at each other. She didn't dare to move nor speak, paralysed by the increasing tension in her lower body. She couldn't believe how much she wanted him again.

'I... Giles, I love you... I don't think I'm in love with you, but I do love you. More than just like a friend... it's... I can't describe it,' she finally said, grimacing. His eyes hadn't left hers, they seemed to shine with renewed passion.

'Thank you,' he answered. 'It-it's good to know that-that you care.' She looked at him, tenderly, and he returned her gaze. She felt warmth fill her completely now, and she so wanted to take him into her arms and give him a hug, to show him just how much she cared for him. But she didn't dare to. Instead, she laid her hand over his, very gently. They remained silent, their eyes both looking down at their hands, at the fingers that slowly started to tangle until they were locked together. Buffy laid her head against his shoulder, comfortably snuggling against his warmth, listening to his heart. It must have been beating really hard, because she could hear it just from pressing her ear to the top of his chest. With a small sigh, she reached out with her other hand and traced the outline of his face, down his temple, his cheekbone, his unshaved cheek, down to his chin. Finally, she placed a small kiss on his throat, before snuggling in closer and closing her eyes. She felt herself drift off into the warmth of his body, a delicious drowsiness slowly gaining her.

* * *

Giles lay on the lush duvet, with Buffy curled up against his shoulder, her face buried against his neck. When she had gone to sleep, he had carefully inched down the bed, so that they lay comfortably on the numerous pillows. Then he too had fallen to sleep, despite all the thoughts that rushed through his mind. Perhaps the intensity of their conversation had been too much for both of them, and they had needed to blot it out by just curling up and going to sleep. Giles let out a sigh, and turned to Buffy. He stroked the golden silk of her hair distractedly, looking at her beautiful face as she slept. Sweet angel, didn't she realise that what she had told him would only cause him to love her all the more? That if she had actually pushed him away, it would have been easier for him to deal with than her gentle affection? He kissed her soft brow lightly, releasing a long sigh. It was then that she stirred and awoke. 

'Hey,' she said, smiling up at him. He looked down at her lovingly.

'Hey,' he replied gently. She slowly propped herself up on her elbow, still lying very close to him.

'What time is it?' she asked, seeming a little confused. Giles glanced at his watch.

'One o'clock. I think we needed the sleep after... well...' he trailed off, unwilling to rouse memories of the previous night. Buffy smiled a little.

'Do you... regret it?' she asked shyly, fingering the bedclothes in the gap between their bodies.

'Last night?' Giles went quiet as he thought it through. 'Yes and no,' he replied finally. Buffy grinned wryly.

'Okay. Why not?' He chuckled a little, he had been expecting her not to drop her questioning so easily.

'Well, because... because I'd been fantasising about this moment for a very long time now... and... and because it was the most incredible sex I've had in over twenty years,' he replied with a grin, quite surprised that those words had actually come out of his lips. Somehow, he felt too relaxed to worry about her reaction, by now. Buffy smirked lustfully.

'You can say that again,' she commented. 'Why yes, then?' Giles let out a little sigh.

'Because I don't know how I'm ever going to manage to keep my hands off you after that,' he replied, and saw her blush a little, although she smiled. 'And-and... well... because... incredible as it was, it was... sex.'

Buffy remained silent for a moment, her eyes had fallen on the duvet between them, which she was pinching and prodding, occasionally pulling out small feathers that started to poke through the fabric. Giles stared at the ceiling, also reflecting about what he had just said. And about the degree of closeness that he and his Slayer had just attained during those two days. It was elating. And frightening.

'Giles,' murmured Buffy, drawing him away from his thoughts. He turned his head towards her, but she was still looking down, fidgeting with a feather between her fingers.

'Yes, Buffy?' he asked gently. She finally looked up at him, and her eyes were shining with the gentle affection that always warmed his heart. He nearly sighed at the sight of it.

'I... I feel like a moron. I told you that I was frustrated... because of Angel...' she grimaced. 'And that... basically, I'd had sex with you because I needed it... for myself. And... I guess that somehow, it's true.' The words stung him very badly. He knew all of this, of course. But for her to actually formulate them, to tell him that it hadn't had all that much to do with him, but more with what she wasn't getting from Angel... now that really made his heart ache. He was about to turn his head away from her wordlessly, but her hand gently but firmly held his cheek down, so that he looked at her.

'But now I know how you feel... I... I realise that... well, I guess I'd like to give you something. If you want it, of course...' she released his face and let out a little sigh. Giles propped himself up on his elbow, so that he could face her properly. She had blushed a little, and she bit her lip nervously, averting her gaze from him.

'What... what is it?' he asked softly. She finally looked back up at him. Her gaze was intense now, highly charged with loving, caring... and what looked very much like desire. Giles shivered a little.

'I'd like to... give myself to you... to make love to you. One last time... just for you,' she said, blushing wildly, but still holding his gaze. He stared at her, unable to move, to speak, to breathe. Maybe even his heart had stopped. Finally, she looked away, and it was as if she were releasing him. He could feel his heart beat violently in his chest, and took in a gasp of air, feeling his body start to tremble, as if it were about to fall.

'I-I... Buffy...' was all he could manage to formulate, he didn't know himself what he was thinking. Buffy's hand snaked onto his and closed over it.

'It's okay. If you don't want to, it's okay,' she said gently. He felt her lips gently press against his forehead, and he closed his eyes. She was bathing him with warm, sweet love, just with her touch, her mouth. Would he ever manage to go without it, afterwards? Would he ever manage to hold back his gushing feelings for her? With his eyes still closed, he nestled his face against her throat, and felt her hand leave his, so that she could curl it around his shoulders, pulling him closer. He let out a long sigh, feeling the heat of her skin under his, breathing in her perfume.

'Buffy...' he murmured, his lips against her throat. 'I-I don't know...' he sighed, and finally pulled away, to look at her. 'I honestly don't...' She smiled at him.

'What's holding you back?' she asked softly, reaching out to run her hand through his hair. Yes, what was? It seemed stupid for him to refuse any scrap of love that she was willing to toss his way. And this was more than just a scrap - it was... incredibly big. Maybe that's what frightened him.

'I... I don't know... don't you think it might... taint... our relationship, somehow?' She looked at him for a while, then gently shook her head.

'No, it won't,' she replied confidently. 'Because whatever happens, you're my Watcher and my friend... and a little something more that I can't really describe. I love you for that, and I really don't want to lose you.' Giles smiled. He was too far-gone by now. He couldn't pretend to himself that he didn't love her, and he couldn't protect himself from hurting when she wasn't with him. He had already felt her skin, her lips, her hands, her body against his, it surely couldn't hurt him to do that one more time... when he was himself, not in some candy-altered state.

'You are the most amazing woman I have ever known, Buffy Summers,' he murmured, slipping his arm around her waist and pulling her close to him. She smiled, pressing her nose against his.

'And you're a wonderful man, Rupert Giles. Don't ever let me take you for granted,' she whispered back to him, and gently pressed her lips against his. He felt his heart glow with delight in his chest, and kissed her lips lightly. For a moment, there was only that, their lips pressed together in a chaste union, sliding lightly against each other. Then finally, Giles reached out to hold the back of her head, and he pulled her closer, parting his lips to suck hers into his mouth. It was a long, sensuous kiss, their tongues slowly slipping against each other, their lips closing again and again over the other's. Finally, Buffy pulled back a little, and smiled at Giles.

'So, I guess that's a yes, then?' she asked with a small grin.

* * *

Buffy hugged him to her, her thighs entwined around his body, and slowly pushed him onto this side to avoid being crushed under his weigh. Giles held her tight, never wanting to let go. He pressed his forehead against hers, and felt sleep slowly start to numb his mind and body. 

'That was fantastic,' he heard Buffy murmur. He smiled a little, dozing off in her arms. He could still feel her hands stroking his back, her lips kissing his temple gently. He was content, even if it was for a short moment.

'Giles, I...' he vaguely heard Buffy whisper, but he was unable to pay attention to her and let himself drift off into blissful sleep.

* * *

There was warmth and love suffusing her entire body and soul. She felt as if she were safe, protected, and loved from head to toe. A smile spread across her lips. She wondered how Angel had ever been able to make her feel this way, so safe, so happy. It had to be a miracle. Some special spell must have made him human again, warm, with a heartbeat, his dark brooding expression replaced with joy and hope for the future... Buffy opened her eyes and realised that she was in Giles' arms, not Angel's. He held her close, showering her face and hair with small kisses to wake her up fully. She felt a little guilty for having thought it was Angel. Not guilty towards Angel - though that would come soon enough - but towards Giles. Because right now, she was in his arms, and she was his gal, nobody else's. Just for a little while. 

She really didn't regret giving herself to him like this. The candy had put their hormones into overdrive the previous night, making them unable to savour what they were doing, turning them into crazed love-bunnies. Yesterday had been about sex, and today was about love, the Slayer thought, gently mouthing kisses all over her Watcher's chest in response to his. She knew that it felt right to be with him. It didn't hurt, that was true. Actually, when Buffy thought that they were soon going to have to get up and never touch like this again, she did feel a little twinge of pain in her chest. She preferred not to imagine what Giles would feel when she left him to go back to her vampire lover. Of course she still loved Angel. She had nearly died of pain when she had killed him, and she felt strangely connected to him. They had even shared dreams. It had to mean that their relationship was the strongest, the most important. Didn't it?

But Giles... Buffy just couldn't pinpoint what it was about him that made him so different from any other man. Maybe it was the fact that, to this day, he was the only one who had given her so much pleasure. It couldn't be that. Buffy angrily tried to shake her thoughts about, hoping that maybe they would land in a better order. There was something that clicked between her and Giles. It had started out with irritating friction; they were always provoking each other. And it had been the same with Angel; he'd always seemed to know how to get her back up. But with Giles... it wasn't like that anymore. Not really. She still teased him and he still lectured her, but they both enjoyed it. It was their special way of bonding. Whereas with Angel, the bickering just got on her nerves. Buffy abandoned that thread of thought, still confused.

'Penny for your thoughts,' she heard Giles say gently. Her mind returned to the room she was in, to Giles' hand gently stroking her shoulder, to the heat of his body and the sound of his heart beating under her ear. She looked up at him.

'I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours,' she replied playfully, not really knowing what to say to him. That she was confused? That she didn't know how they were going to manage to keep their hands off each other? That maybe she was in love with him, but then again, probably not?

'All right. I have no idea how I'm ever going to manage to keep my hands off you, after this,' he murmured lovingly. Buffy grinned against his chest.

'That's spooky. I was thinking the exact same thing,' she lied. Giles' chest heaved with a noisy sigh, and Buffy enjoyed the movement beneath her.

'Maybe an anti-lust spell? Or bromide?' he offered, grinning a little. Buffy chuckled.

'Only if it isn't Willow who does the potion. It's not that I don't trust her with magic, but... well actually, it is that I don't trust her with magic.' Giles snorted. There was a long silence, and this time it felt a little awkward. As if they both wanted to say something but couldn't manage to. Finally, it was Buffy who spoke.

'If only life wasn't so complicated,' she murmured with a sigh, running a hand through the hair on his chest. She heard his sigh loud against her ears. It was true. She could have been 100 in love with Angel, absolutely certain of it, and absolutely happy. But she wasn't. She could have fallen in love with Giles instead of Angel, and been able to return his feelings. But she hadn't. Angel could have been human: there could have never been the curse, no Angelus, just a regular guy. And somehow, Buffy doubted that if he had been a regular guy, she wouldn't have fallen in love with him. She might have had a crush on him for a while, but the hopeless, painful, heart-wrenching love she now felt for him would have never had a reason to be. God, "complicated" didn't even cover it.

'I know. I didn't want to make things between you and Angel even more difficult,' he whispered against her hair. She shrugged.

'If everything between us was completely fine, I wouldn't be in bed with you right now,' she answered, a little sadly. Giles gently squeezed her shoulder.

'Whatever happens, Buffy... I'll be there... you know that, don't you?' he said, very gently. His kind words, his selflessness nearly brought tears to her eyes. She hadn't ever realised just how much he gave of himself. She snuggled closer to him, hugging him hard, sad to be unable to pay him back in kind.

'Giles, what did I ever do to deserve you?' her words came out of her mouth as a squeak, her throat made tight with unshed tears. He wrapped his arms tighter around her and bathed her with his warmth. She sighed a little, snuggling into his arms, knowing that this was going to be the last of their intimate moments. God knew she didn't want to end it this way. The more she thought about leaving his embrace, the more her heart ached. What was it with him that she just... craved? That was the word. Ever since they had met, she had needed him really badly. Obviously, before this weekend, it hadn't been about sex. It had been about his support, his understanding, his protection, his care... and now? Now she needed everything, including his love... his touch. God, she had to snap out of this. It was doing her no good to think like that. Even if Angel hadn't been there, it was impossible. He was her Watcher. He was a teacher. If anyone found out about this, she would get kicked out of school, he'd get fired... and he would maybe even be forced to go back to England. She couldn't have him like that, she couldn't put him in danger. He'd already lost one job - his sacred duty - because of her, and that was enough. Besides, there was Angel. She'd loved him first. She loved him most. Didn't she? Buffy groaned with frustration. Again with the thoughts going absolutely nowhere.

'Are you all right, Buffy?' asked Giles gently. She pulled out of his embrace and sat up in bed.

'Yeah, sorry... just... oxygen, not enough of it,' she lied, forcing a smile onto her face. He watched her, obviously not believing her. It was so hard to lie to Giles. It was so impossible to lie to him. It was as if he could read in her mind.

'Perhaps we should get going. It's already half three, and we both have to be at school tomorrow,' he said gently. Buffy nodded at him, feeling cold and empty already.

'Yeah... why don't you go and take a shower while I get my bags ready?' she offered. Giles nodded and squeezed her hand one last time before getting up and walking to the bathroom. He looked sad. Not his face, but the way he walked, his entire body screamed that he was in pain. God, what had she done? What had Faith done? Buffy would have confronted the other Slayer with that, but she didn't want to give away her little adventure with Giles. That was between the two of them. Their secret garden. A moment that would be theirs and theirs only, not to be shared with anyone, ever.

* * *

The drive home was quite silent, apart from a few unusually shy comments from Buffy about directions. Giles had switched the radio on, and Mozart's Requiem filled the Citroen. It seemed to fit their dark mood. Giles sometimes cast a glance on his Slayer, only to find her gazing out of the window absently, a melancholy expression on her face. Well, they were going to have to cope, now. He was going to have to stand by and watch another pillock from the Council take his place in Buffy's life. And then of course, he was going to have to watch her dating bloody Angel. He had never liked the man. The fact that, in his full vampire form, he had killed Jenny, tortured him and emotionally crippled Buffy for probably the rest of her life didn't help, obviously. But Giles knew that he couldn't interfere. His Slayer seemed to love the vampire, and he couldn't tell her how to feel, nor did he even want to. All he wanted was for her to be happy, inasmuch she could find happiness with a vampire who was doomed to unhappiness for all eternity. 

Giles didn't regret what had happened between them. Now they had attained a more intimate stage of their relationship. They were no longer student and teacher. Travers' father and daughter categorisation had been sent to hell, thank God. He felt that they had become close friends, to say the least. And now he knew that she cared for him. Cared enough to want to give herself to him, to make him happy. How he loved her for that, for everything. He had thought that he couldn't be more in love with her than he had been before - and he was wrong. Now he loved her so much that it physically hurt. He had never felt like this before. Even Jenny hadn't made him feel so wretched and so wonderfully happy at the same time. Perhaps that was fortunate, considering how much more shattered he would have been at her death, if he had loved her like he did Buffy. He sighed inwardly. But Buffy too was going to die, one day, perhaps sooner than he thought. And he knew that he would probably be lost, on that day. How could he live without her? He knew that he couldn't. They'd go together or she wouldn't go at all.

He glanced back at her. Yes, they had arrived to a new stage of their relationship. He only wondered if it was good or bad. The distance that had been between them had stopped him from suffering unbearably from her absence, from her love for somebody else, from the fact that he couldn't even touch her the way he wanted to. He would just have to get a grip over himself. For her sake. Because even though he hurt now, it was nothing compared to how much he would hurt if they got separated. He already worried enough as it was about the fact of being replaced by another Watcher. Would that man also replace him in her heart? Would she go run to her new Watcher rather than to him for help and advice? Although it would only be natural for her to do so, Giles ached at the thought. He shot another glance at Buffy. She was watching him.

'You okay?' she asked softly. Giles nodded. 'You have worried-face,' she insisted quietly. Giles sighed and gave in.

'I was thinking about the new Watcher who's supposed to replace me,' he replied, hearing the sadness in his own voice and cursing himself for being so transparent.

'What about him?' asked Buffy.

'W-well...' he sighed. 'I don't know.' He felt his Slayer's eyes on him for a long moment.

'Giles, he's not going to replace you. Nobody can replace you. You're my Watcher. I don't care what the jerks of the Council say, you'll always be my Watcher.' Giles felt himself warm up at her words.

'Thank you,' he answered. She smiled.

'Hey, it's normal. You're a big part of my life. You were always there when it was important and you stood by me even when I was acting like a mega-dork. It's not gonna stop because the Council says so.' He smiled fondly, finding that his eyes were filling with tears. He quickly blinked them back, unable to tell if they were tears of pain or joy. He saw her smile back, and she was truly like an angel. Giles bit at his lip and sped up. The faster they were home, the shorter the torture would be.

* * *

Buffy opened the front door, and entered the house. The familiar smell of roasting chicken that filled the ground floor only made her feel sick, even though a part of her was famished. They hadn't eaten all that much while they were away in the mountains. But there was a dark, painful feeling in the pit of her stomach that she didn't know how to define, and it was gnawing at her, taking away all the other sensations. She took a deep breath, to collect herself, and walked into the kitchen. 

'Hey Mom!' she exclaimed as she entered. Her mother turned from the stove and smiled at her.

'Buffy! I was hoping that you'd be back for dinner!' she exclaimed. 'How was the trip?'

'Demon-y. You wouldn't have liked it. There were snowballs and mucus, blecch,' she said, sticking her tongue out for good measure.

'The sweet words your children will say to you,' replied Joyce with a smirk and a shrug. 'How was Mr. Giles?'

'Very good,' she replied without thinking. When she realised what she had just said, she felt her face flare up. 'I mean yeah, you know he was Watcher-y good. He helped me kill the demon. Well actually, he killed the demon. Very good. Yeah.' Her mother turned around and raised an eyebrow.

'Mr. Giles killed the demon? I thought that Slayers slay and Watchers... well, watch.' Buffy rolled her eyes and went to casually sit down at the island, still feeling a little flustered by what she had just said about him. "Very good". God, she was lucky that she hadn't said "scorching hot" or "a real studmuffin". That would have been a dead giveaway. For the time being, her Mom didn't seem to have noticed anything, and it was going to stay that way. Well, if she stopped being a mega-klutz.

'Well, sometimes Watchers do get a bit of action - I mean, get into the action.' Buffy bit her tongue hard. If she went on like that, all Sunnydale was going to know within a week.

'So why do they need a Slayer? I mean, couldn't they do your job, and let you... go to College, for example?' Buffy rolled her eyes.

'I am not having this conversation again,' she growled. Ever since she'd sat down, she had started to nervously break up a slice of bread into tiny, tiny pieces, to try and rid herself of some of her nervous tension. 'Besides, Giles got fired, so he's not a Watcher anymore, ergo he couldn't replace me anyway.' Latin words. She was using Giles' Latin words! God, please make her stop, now!

'Oh well, I suppose so,' sighed Joyce. 'I still don't like it that he ravished you for the weekend.'

'MOTHER!' exclaimed Buffy, shocked. Joyce turned around, surprised by her sudden cry. It was only then that Buffy realised that her Mom hadn't meant ravished in that way. She concentrated her attention onto the breadcrumbs on the table, pushing them into three separate little piles, trying to keep her head low to hide her blush. God, guilt was turning her into a moron. Unless she was one already.

'Oh darling, I know that it's your job, but I was looking forward to going shopping with you, you know?' said her mother in the sweetest voice. Buffy felt even guiltier for having misunderstood her.

'And I promise that we will go shopping next weekend,' said Buffy firmly, forcing herself to look up at her Mom. 'And whatever new monster the Hellmouth spits out, well, Faith and the gang can deal with it.' Buffy and her mother smiled at each other, and the Slayer heaved an inner sigh of relief.

'Oh, by the way, Angel called in, yesterday night. He was looking for you.' Buffy shuddered at the mention of his name, and her throat ached. God, Angel. She was going to have to lie to him, too. Just thinking of him was really painful and scary. She felt so guilty.

'What did you tell him?' asked Buffy, forcing the words out of her mouth and viciously breaking her bread into even smaller pieces.

'I told him that you went on an emergency mission to kill some demon in the mountains and that maybe you'd be back tonight. He said you could come by when you get back,' she replied. Buffy pulled a face. She didn't want to go and see Angel. She just wanted to go to bed and sleep for years. Maybe she wouldn't hurt as much when she woke up. Maybe sleeping would wipe away what she and Giles had done. Maybe she would know what to do and whom she loved afterwards. Buffy sighed, and tore more bread into tiny confetti. If only it could be that simple.

* * *

Giles dumped his bags on the ground and made a beeline to the counter. He needed a stiff drink. It had been a torture to drop Buffy off at her house and let her go away. Their awkward conversation repeated itself again and again in his mind, echoing through his brain. 

'Well, here we are then,' he had let out matter-of-factly. She'd just nodded, before undoing her seatbelt and grabbing the bags from the back seat.

'Okay, then,' she'd said, obviously nervous.

'I-I'll see you tomorrow then?' he'd asked. Buffy had nodded, opening the car's door.

'Yeah, in the library. Right,' she'd replied. He'd heard her set foot outside.

'Right,' he'd repeated quietly. They had avoided eye contact as much as possible. In fact, he hadn't looked at her at all. He had known that if he had, he'd have wanted to kiss her all over again. And he couldn't.

'Bye, then!' she'd let out, closing the door to the car a little harder than necessary. He'd just nodded and driven away.

Giles sighed as he poured himself a large scotch and downed half of it in one gulp. It helped wipe out the echoes of their conversation from his mind. God, but this was hard. He had had her one moment, only to let her go the next. He knew that it was part of the deal, he had tried to psychologically prepare for it. But it was no use, he still ached more than ever inside. Faith and her tricks be damned! Wasn't it hard enough to just love her, knowing that he would never have her? At least when he loved her from afar, he knew that he had absolutely no hope of her ever responding to him. But she had. Granted, she had been sexually frustrated for months. But the second time hadn't been about that. He should have refused. Now it was too late. Now he felt emptier than ever.

As Giles swallowed the last of his drink, the phone rang. He eyed the offending device, willing it to stop ringing under his steely glare. No such luck. After five rings, the answering machine switched on, and he sighed with relief. Thank the Scooby gang for having bought him one for Christmas. Giles grimaced at the sound of his own voice in the introductory message, rolling his eyes at how stiff he sounded. Stupid old fuddy-duddy. The person hung up before they could leave a message. Giles shrugged, and made his way to the machine, to see if someone had tried to reach him while he was away. There were two messages on the machine. He pressed on the button to listen to them.

'Hey, Giles, this is Willow. Some English guy called your office and asked to speak to you, so in case you're not gone yet, I gave him your private number. Hope you don't mind. I didn't really think that you'd mind, but now I'm not sure it was the right thing to do.' Giles smiled fondly, recognising Willow going into full nervous babble mode. 'As to why I was in your office... well, it hasn't got anything to do with reading books you don't want me to read, if that's what you're thinking. God knows that I'd never do that. The phone just rang and I picked it up. See? No biggie. Okay, well, I just wanted to say that. Oh, and I hate answering machines, did you notice? Bye.' Giles shook her head a little, still smiling. Willow and the rest of the Scooby Gang would be a good way to focus on something else than Buffy, for a change. Maybe they would help him overcome a little of his growing depression. The machine beeped, and played the next message.

'Mister Giles, this is Wesley Windham-Pryce, from the Watcher's Council,' said a man in a crisp English accent. Giles cringed. That was all he needed. 'I have just arrived in Sunnydale, in order to replace you as Ms Summers' Watcher.' Giles felt himself boil inside. 'It seems that both you and Ms Summers are unavailable right now, but I would like you to call me back as soon as...'

The message was interrupted when Giles wrenched the tape out of the machine. He chucked it on the ground, oblivious to the fact that it was unravelling all over the table and floor. He then took pleasure in stomping the offending voice away as he cracked the tape into tiny pieces under his foot. But this Windham-Pryce's voice still played in his head, over and over. "In order to replace you as Ms Summers' Watcher". Every time it went over in his head, it sounded a little worse. Giles got up, took his bottle of scotch and a tumbler, before going to slump in his couch. He then proceeded to get very, very drunk, blinking back the tears that stung in his eyes.

Viv, March 2001 (this is an edited version of an adult story - for the complete version, please go to the Buffy/Giles section of www .neptunienne. net)

Author's note: sorry, but the story will not be continued after this point.


End file.
